It's not your fault. Tell yourself that until you believe it. It is hard but you did everything you could to have a healthy pregnancy. As for the MRI - it might be possible to find someone who will do it without sedating her. My son has had to have lots of renal scans and other tests. They wanted to sedate him for the first one at 7 weeks old. I refused. I called drs and techs and spoke to numerous people until they agreed we would not sedate him. They managed to get it done anyway. It wasn't pleasant either but safer. They did warn me if he wasn't still enough we might have to do it again. We have now done it 5 times and never with sedation. The best way is to do it when he is asleep but that can be tricky. I will tell you they do wrap him in a sheet and tape him to the bed. Anyway talk to the dr there might be other options