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Patriarchal emotionality
I always used to say (and think) that the whole "PMS = emotional" thing was just a schtick concocted by (who else?) the patriarchy to denigrate women and make them ashamed of their bodies, not to mention blame them for the crap they do wrong. And to a large extent, I still believe that.
I mean, think of all of the stupid products we have on the market to help women conceal their menstrual cycles, their body odors, etc. And how there is so much embarrassment wrapped up in girls' bodies that seems to just somehow seep into the consciousness of young women anywhere from 10-15 years old. And so on.
But I have to say, that spontaneous period thing on Tuesday night was BY FAR the /best/ thing that has ever happened to my funky Valentine's Day mood. Things had been kind of rocky for that whole weekend and of course - because, hello? I'm human - I blamed it all on Jen. Not that I'm letting Jen off scot-free, mind you (*giggle*), but hey, maybe I was a little extra, erm, sensitive. Or something. Yeah.
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Also, I'm totally fooling myself that I'm going to start having more normal-ish cycles now that I've doubled the Metformin. I'm fooling myself so much so that I'm becoming a charting fool. "Just for giggles," I keep telling myself... but I'm secretly hoping that heck, maybe this will work and I'll actually ovulate somewhere in there. (I've made a few past attempts at charting but they always ended up in frustration... a few 100+ day cycles will do that to you.) So we'll see, right? It's appealing to my Inner Nerd, anyway. Aaah, graphs and spreadsheets.
I mean, think of all of the stupid products we have on the market to help women conceal their menstrual cycles, their body odors, etc. And how there is so much embarrassment wrapped up in girls' bodies that seems to just somehow seep into the consciousness of young women anywhere from 10-15 years old. And so on.
But I have to say, that spontaneous period thing on Tuesday night was BY FAR the /best/ thing that has ever happened to my funky Valentine's Day mood. Things had been kind of rocky for that whole weekend and of course - because, hello? I'm human - I blamed it all on Jen. Not that I'm letting Jen off scot-free, mind you (*giggle*), but hey, maybe I was a little extra, erm, sensitive. Or something. Yeah.
~//~
Also, I'm totally fooling myself that I'm going to start having more normal-ish cycles now that I've doubled the Metformin. I'm fooling myself so much so that I'm becoming a charting fool. "Just for giggles," I keep telling myself... but I'm secretly hoping that heck, maybe this will work and I'll actually ovulate somewhere in there. (I've made a few past attempts at charting but they always ended up in frustration... a few 100+ day cycles will do that to you.) So we'll see, right? It's appealing to my Inner Nerd, anyway. Aaah, graphs and spreadsheets.
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And I realized that 95% of the times that I get upset and cry and think my partner is insensitive fall within The Week Before. I used to think PMS was a joke for all the reasons you listed, but after charting, I realized that they didn't make it up, they just exploited us over it to make money.
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I hope!
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I've never noticed an ovulation any other time I've charted (one time when I had been taking Metformin for a little while I had a 60ish day cycle but I didn't notice any temp trend, and once before Met I charted and got to day 100 with no period and just gave up)... and I am probably foolish for doing so, but I have this silly optimistic feeling that it will just happen.
We'll see!
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I was going to recommend the book < a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060937645/sr=8-1/qid=1140233696/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-0891223-7701520?%5Fencoding=UTF8">Taking Charge of Your Fertility to you.
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Right now I'm just doing temps and CM and all of that, just to see if I can /finally/ come up with SOME sort of pattern now that I'm taking so much freaking Metformin. We'll see. Also, a friend of mine has a ferning microscope thinger and if she wants to lend it to me, I'll check that out, too.
Also, I read TCOYF a while back but it's definitely worth another go. I should get it from the library.
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I've used the ferning microscope before too - it's a little tricky but interesting.
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I never heard back from my friend re: the ferning microscope. So we'll see. I probably won't go out and buy one any time soon.
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By the way, there is this great site: http://www.earlypregnancytests.com where you can get cheap pregnancy test strips & ovulation test strips. Sometimes with the ovulation thing they make you check oncce in the morning & once at night. I use the ovulation test strips from this site for the night test.
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Thanks for the website. I know you can also buy cheap pregnancy tests at the dollar store and stuff... but it's always good to have more options.
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http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060937645/sr=8-1/qid=1140233696/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-0891223-7701520?%5Fencoding=UTF8
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A couple of weeks ago I bumped up to 2000mg at the suggestion of my endocrinologist, all 2000mg at once in the morning in extended release form (supposedly it has less side effects, but also causes less weight loss and stuff). I haven't had any problems with that either, unless I eat way too much sugar.
I probably shouldn't, but today I had two slices of cake (one for breakfast, one for a snack this afternoon) and a cupcake (after lunch). Oops!
If you didn't take the extended-release version last time, try it if you want. I seriously haven't even /noticed/ the doubled dose. (Except for wolfing down 4 horse pills every morning.)
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