judecorp: (my sunshine)
judecorp ([personal profile] judecorp) wrote2006-12-09 03:39 pm

Shower!

I took a shower today. It's a beautiful thing and I feel like a human today. I hadn't showered since the whole bleeding thing because I was scared to stand up too long, but it was fine.

It's weird to live life in fear, because that's not my way. But I am so paranoid that I have either lost my baby already or are going to shortly. It's really all I can think about. Tuesday cannot come soon enough so I can know one way or another.

[identity profile] ntiva.livejournal.com 2006-12-09 09:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Showers are truly amazing things. I know how great that feeling is to feel human again.

I want you to know you've been in my constant thoughts and prayers. I know how hard it is to wait for the news you are waiting for. Tuesday is almost here.

[identity profile] judecorp.livejournal.com 2006-12-09 09:46 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm both excited and scared for Tuesday. I mean, I /really/ want to see and hear some good news and I can't wait to get to that point where it can happen. But of course I'm terrified that we will have bad news, since Baby B died and I had no idea. Heck, it probably died right as I was telling my grandparents that we were having twins. What if the same thing happens again? Argh.

I guess I will keep taking showers if nothing else.