HEY, LESBIANS!!

[judecorp]

Tonight Jen and I decided we would bake cookies, but we didn't have any baking soda. We walked to the convenience store down the street to pick some up, and when we were crossing at an intersection, this guy in a Mercedes SUV starts yelling out his window: "LESBIANS! LESBIANS! HEY, LESBIANS! LESBIAN POWER!" and all kinds of goofy stuff like that. I didn't know what to do or say because I couldn't stop laughing. I was in the middle of the crosswalk just laughing and laughing with my hands in my pockets.

I commented to Jen that I derived amusement at the difference between car-yellers here and in Columbus. In Columbus, most of the stuff yelled out of cars was really mean-spirited, like that guy that stopped in front of us to yell, "No fucking gay marriage for fucking gays!" With this guy, he was obviously making a spectacle of us, but he wasn't hostile about it. He was pretty jovial and was yelling in that "WHOO HOO" manner akin to, say, Girls Gone Wild. This isn't to say he wasn't mocking us, because he certainly was, but he wasn't hostile or aggressive or anything. Fascinating.

What was /more/ fascinating was that we saw him driving the other way when we were on our way home, and he made sure to yell, "LESBIANS!" a couple more times. Goon.

~//~

In a vaguely related note, I've been experimenting a little bit with more femininity. I think it comes from dressing up for job interviews. I was definitely raised to think that dressing up means wearing skirts. I don't wear skirts now, but I still have that lingering feeling that I'm not dressed up unless I'm wearing girls' clothing. Even if I'm wearing dressy men's clothing, I still feel underdressed. So today for my interview with Big Sisters, I wore a ribbed shirt that is girly in the sense that it shows boobs and requires me to wear a real bra. Yowza.

I think I look pretty hot in some girls' clothes. My hair has started resisting the spikiness and is just parting itself on the side. Even though it's not very long, it looks girly (especially when I'm wearing girl clothes). Between the hair and the boobs, and the fact that short hair is becoming quite trendy for girls, I'm starting to look like a bonafide girl again. Weird.

In some ways, I really like it. I've been thinking a lot about developing and reveling in my femininity. I think this was enhanced quite a bit by the March for Women's Lives. There's something about tapping into that energy of woman-ness that is appealing to me. I think part of it also comes from having everyone assume I'm a lesbian so much that I'm starting to explore that identity. Jen and I went to the Dyke March here and there were so many androgynous boychicks that it made me want to separate from that. I'm definitely one of those people who shies away from things when they become trendy. Like piercings. I like getting piercings, but then when everyone gets the piercing I have, I want to remove it. Or something.

The one thing holding me back from femme-ing out a little bit (I said that for you, heathergirlie) is that I'm really reluctant to have Jen and I look like the stereotypical butch-femme coupling at first glance. It's enough that people make assumptions about me or us without having people then make gender role assumptions on top of that, like who is the "breadwinner" or who "wears the pants" or whatever. Granted, I'm not about to become a circa 1950s housewife, but you get the idea. I've been toying around with the idea of wearing a dress to my brother's wedding reception, but I know Jen will be wearing a suit and I don't want to be a "suit-dress" couple, if that makes any sense. Which it probably doesn't. Because I'm a dork.

This is becoming the longest, most babbling entry ever. And it's about nothing. But seriously, this has been on my mind lately. Jen and I are trying to get into better shape and lose some weight (not at all assisted by massive amounts of cookie making) and I know that if I lose some of the saddle-bag effect on the hips I will want to start wearing my cutesy little baby-doll tshirts again. And well, there's no mistaking the girl in me in those shirts, because they're all boob. And they're cute as hell. And then I become "the girl."

This really isn't an issue when I don't have to get really dressed up for something (ie a wedding reception). I wish I could find something really in between that is wedding appropriate. I don't want to wear a skirt suit or any lame compromise like that. I don't know what I want, really. Maybe I'll just wear the same linen pants I wore to crena's wedding last year. Dressing up is so complicated! Ugh!

~//~

In other news, I think I am going to buy Red Sox tickets for me, my father, and my grandfather for Father's Day. We used to all go to a baseball game together every summer with the Freemason lodge that they belong to, but that hasn't happened since I was about 14 or 15. My father is going to ask my grandfather if he is interested in coming up next Thursday for an afternoon game. I'm excited at the possibility, even if it would involve sinking a HUGE sum of money (even with just outfield grandstand tickets) at a time when I have no income. Still, my grandfather is 86 and I have no idea how many summers he'll be up and around enough to come up to Boston and enjoy a game, and I've missed so many summers in Ohio. And with my father having that heart attack in 2001, you just never know what can happen. I hope they say they want to go, because I really think it will be a special day for all of us. I would love to snap a billion pictures.

My grandfather really is the cutest, most adorable man on the planet. For real. He is about 4'10" tall and has the reddest little Portuguese cheeks and is just cute as a button. I hope Operation: Sox Game is a success!

Comments

[folkyboy.livejournal.com]

hahaha i love that lesbian story! it's the best :)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_epiphany_girl_/]

You knew as soon as you wrote "gender roles" that I'd be reading/responding, didn't you?

(And then she mentioned me by name! Oh *blush* *blush*! hehe)

Anyway, yay for you for exploring your identity--girlie/boi-y, whatever. More exploration mo' better, i say. :) So yay for that.

But maybe starting off with the wedding would be too much? How about just little things around town?

As for looking butch-femme.... well.... That's not you, so I understand why that would freak you out. But on the other hand, I have to say that you know that people are judging your gender roles *anyway*, right? I mean, when they see two butches together (or whatever--you know this is my language... I know you don't consider yourself butch... just for ease of my explanation, I'm going to use the terms. I hope that doesn't offend. *wink*), they're trying to figure out who is the "breadwinner," "who's the man"--whatever. I mean, I'm sure people have even *yelled* that shit at you from cars, right? ;) hehe.

So if you're perceived as the femme, what does that mean about you? I mean, that sounds like that's what you're concerned about--that people will see you and Jen together and say, "Ah, *you* must be the little woman!" So I challenge you... what's so wrong with that?

I mean, I know that's not you, so *that's* what's so wrong with that, but what I'm saying is that, as lesbians, we'd so much rather be seen as "the strong one" if that's the choice. If the outside world (or hell, even other dykes) are going to be binary with gender roles, then I wanna be the one who's not stuck with all the women's roles baggage. I'd venture that you like confounding their expectations by not being the femme with the butch.

But I ask: Why can't you confound their expectations as femme-ish? Why not have people see you as femme-ish and then subvert the idea of what the femme is by not being stereotypically feminine, but still a girl in the appearance sense? Why not be the girl and pay for the dinner (confuses people sometimes, I'll tell ya)?

What I'm saying is that when you're scared of being labeled the femme, you're saying, "I don't want that laundry list of oppressive things put on me." And what I'm saying to you is, "Neither do I. And I don't have them, either."

Besides, fuck everyone else. Your self expression isn't slave to anyone else's perception anyway.

/soapbox.

LESBIAN POWER!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I posted it just for you.

Re: LESBIAN POWER!

[folkyboy.livejournal.com]

i'm so special

[being-homeless.livejournal.com]

I wanna be a cool lesbian just like you.
lets go toy shopping.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Dude.

Tell me when/where you want to go toy shopping and I am so there.

Which reminds me, Jen and I still have a gift certificate to Good Vibrations that we have to use...

[thespian.livejournal.com]

there's apparently a gay couple in the remake of The Stepford Wives, in which one of them obviously needs to get treated as 'the wife'. It's by Paul Rudnick, though, so I'm not sure if it will be handled campily and well (Jeffery, In & Out), or really tackily (the handling of gays in Marci X).

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I'm planning to see The Stepford Wives so I can certainly let you know.

Although knowing that, it makes me a leeeettle more leery of the movie.

[maybelater.livejournal.com]

The same exact situation (yelling from an asshole in an SUV) happened to my ex and I a couple of times. We were just walking together, not even holding hands or doing anything to indicate we were together.

Mildly amusing, but ultimately, annoying.

[skiadaimonos.livejournal.com]

You know, this is the kind of stuff that seems the most interesting but also confusing to me about gender, namely people's understandings of categorical aesthetics, the "sanctity" (or falsness) of binarism in both gender and sex, and the extent to which politicization impacts choice and expression.

It also kinda strikes me that I have a hard time relegating clear femininity or masculinity to several styles/things... probably because i often have a hard time setting clear rules for qualifiers such as "pretty," "powerful" etc, which also do not seem to be divisible in gender lines. Suits (pant suits) for instance, i find that they can be really sexy and pretty even without frilliness (or whatever other quality would demarkate "feminine").
So, with apologies for my gender (theory and practice) retardedness, may i ask what is your take on aesthetics and why?

[sunshyne72.livejournal.com]

I saw Stepford on Saturday--he definitely helped add a comic-ness to the movie-there's these two parts that are sooo flippin' funny, I laughed some 10 mins after!! One's with a flashlight and the other is when the threesome are spying (in case you see it, you'll know what I mean).

They sort of DO the sterotypical femme/butch roles, but you know it's a movie and unfortunately that is what ends most of the time in Hollywood.

[sunshyne72.livejournal.com]

Well--IMO, I think you should dress how you feel like dressing be it up or down, girl or boy. I think I understand your wishes not be seen as "that type of couple" with the specific ROLES, but does it really matter in the end?

I mean you are part of a couple and that is what's important. There are soo many blind/stupid/ignorant people in the world, don't let them ruin or rule how you want to act or dress.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I agree re: amusing, yet annoying.

I mean, this one time, it was funny. When it becomes the third, or fifth, or seventh time? Yeah, that's going to suck.

Hopefully that won't happen.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Wow - that's a good question. And I'm not sure I can give you a clear and good answer, but I'm going to try.

I guess for me it's less about aesthetics and more about what's comfortable for me. I was raised by a single father and a brother, and there was definitely a lot of traditionally masculine influence in my life. At the same time, my feminine influence came from my grandmother who lived next door - unfortunately, this took the form of a 1950s-era housewife mentality in the sense that she felt that, as a girl, I should be learning to clean house and take care of a man who would eventually be my husband. She heavily discouraged me from playing sports, from being loud, from going into "men's" careers, etc. And I didn't feel like I wanted to be this person, so I didn't feel like I wanted to be female. Does that make sense?

Of course, now I know that femininity isn't all about cleaning house and taking care of a husband and wearing skirts. I actually went through a time where I embraced girly things and liked how I looked. I was also married to a boy at the time. So when we split up, I think I went back to that person who was more comfortable with herself, that sort of androgynous, fluid individual who had a lot of confidence.

I am aesthetically attracted to all sorts of things and people, whether traditionally masculine, traditionally feminine, or anywhere in between. I enjoy the soft curves of the female body, even moreso when those soft curves exist on a harder, more muscular, frame. But I think I'm digressing.

The issue is more about where /I/ am comfortable, gender-wise. I suppose part of me is still that little girl who is rebelling against the idea of being "someone's pretty wife." Part of me /likes/ the way I have been able to use androgyny to dabble in male privilege. But mostly, I'm just someone who does not want my appearance to be a part of a greater "image" that society thinks I'm trying to portray.

I don't like the fact that my appearance as it stands seems to advertise, "I am a lesbian" to random people on the street. But I /like/ the fact that both Jen and I are somewhat gender-ambiguous, because at least it stops those idiots who like to enforce male/female binary gender roles on same-sex relationships from assuming that one of us is "top"ping the other. Even though the majority of two-women relationships are not the stereotypical "butch/femme" of the days of yore, I don't know that society has caught up with that. I guess I don't want to "encourage" the old stereotype by allowing others to assume that Jen is "the man" and I am "the woman."

I know that I shouldn't care what society thinks, and to a degree I don't, but the binary gender system is so damned annoying to me that I don't want to play into it.

Sorry. That was long and didn't make much sense.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Well of course I should dress "how I feel like it," but at the same time, a family wedding reception dictates a certain level of dress regardless of how I am comfortable. I am most comfortable in some sort of baggy casual pants and a tshirt, but that doesn't mean I should wear it to a wedding, you know?

Confounded in this is the fact that I love my brother with all of my heart and don't want anything, absolutely anything, to detract from his and Gretchen's special day. I know that to some degree my relationship with Jen will already be somewhat of a spectacle (with older family members, especially G's who have never met us) and I guess I don't want to... enhance that in any way.

I know that she and I will interact in our own way regardless of which way others may think we interact by our dress. I know that. But because breaking down gender role stereotypes is one of those things I'm passionate about in my life, I feel like it's something I need to work at 24/7. Which, unfortunately, affects my clothing decisions when it comes to this wedding.

I think it's one of those things you can't really imagine until you've lived it. There's something about just plain walking into some sort of special occasion (whether it's a family gathering or a company holiday party or whatever) and /knowing/ that people are staring at you just because you're in a relationship that's somewhat outside of the mainstream that adds a little more social anxiety to the mix than is befitting the occasion.

[skiadaimonos.livejournal.com]

Nooooo! That was tremendously interesting, and made quite a bit of sense.

If i may ask a little further, as far as you are concerned at least, how tight of a connection exists between your aesthetics and reactions to social/political aspects and roles of gender, and sexual orientation?

Hope this is not too rude or personal a question. It is just that gender is another of those areas from which i remain largely detached (partially at least by choice), but i feel that this also really hinders my ability to sufficiently understand the role of gender in the lives and minds of others. Actually there is only one other person with whom I've had the chance to discuss/consider gender extensively and I'd love to hear some different perspectives.

[jeffholton.livejournal.com]

...he made sure to yell, "LESBIANS!" a couple more times.

Maybe he just wanted to let y'all know in case you weren't aware of it.

Nice of him.

[sunshyne72.livejournal.com]

That makes sense. I was taking the dressing thing more as an everyday occurrance not just a "this instance" for the wedding type thing. Completely understand the family acceptance or non-acceptance piece. Well, good luck either way you decide to go and good luck to your brother!

[oddharmonic.livejournal.com]

I prefer mildly annoying yellers to hostile ones, so I would have done something goofy like yelled "HEY! STRAIGHT GUY!" back at him. Then again, I've developed a habit of leaving the radio on a dance station so we can pretend to be club kids in the car. It's fun to car-dance at stoplights with the midget.

You've looked hawt in every picture I've seen. I've going back to wearing skirts because it's cooler in the ucky summer heat here in Texas.

I have a pretty lightweight crinkly cotton outfit (tan and cream wrap pants with a matching short-sleeve blouse) that might fit you. When I'm home in July, I'll photograph it and send you an e-mail with a link to the photo and a description of it.

Hope you have luck with the Sox tickets. I'd contribute to it via PayPal just because it's the coolest Father's Day idea I've heard in a long time. (I'm giving mine a Home Depot gift card since I'm living too far away to visit yet again.)

[mrmoe.livejournal.com]

You've always been feminine to me. Not just because I had(ve) a huge crush on you at one(all) point(s), nor because my heart beat(s) faster when your mind turned(s) my way. It's because I've always seen you as a counterbalance to those aspects of my own persona that I perceive as specifically masculine.

Complete tangent. I owe you an interview.

The aforementioned aspects are difficult to define, being simultaneously specific and amorphous, but mostly hovering around the categories of self-image, personal role in society, and responsibility to others. Unsurprisingly, I perceive at least two of these categories coming into play with this posting.

When I focus in on the issue you raise in your cut-text, I seem to be unable to tear myself away from one particular dichotomy. It appears to me that the conflict here is between how you feel about your femininity, and how others view your expression of that femininity in the arena of fashion. In short, an internal experience vs. an external event.

I read you talking about positive aspects of finding 'girlie' traits in your appearance, everything from clothing to hair. And I read you fearing about a particular flavour of discrimination from others when they view you in a snapshot experience where that femininity is displayed. I use the word 'discrimination' in the literal definition of 'seeking out and ascertaining the truth'. In this context, the discrimination would occur upon their using the visual cues of both your appearance in contrast to Jen's and the affinity of your presence together to assign traditional heterosexual gender roles to the both of you. Bluntly, less than fifteen seconds' observation of the pair of you being enough to decide that you and Jen are a couple, and that you're the more feminine of the two.

I will conclude this ramble with some questions:
1) In the hypothetical instance where an anonymous observer assigns gender roles to you and Jen, are you more uncomfortable with the fact it was assigned to you, or her?
2) Do you worry that the 'femme' gender assignment will also carry a connotation of you having lesser authority/fortitude/personal power?
3) Are you worried about having someone make an assumption that you're inherently more submissive than Jen? Or in general that there is an inequity in your relationship?
4) Did you give any thought to the perceptions of those familiar with you, instead of those who are making assumptions on initial snapshot perceptions? Do you worry that those who know you may have a change in their overall opinion of you personally should you tend towards the feminine more frequently?
5) Is there something specific that makes being perceived as more of a boychick more comfortable/acceptable than being perceived as a 'girl'? One thing that gets under your skin more than the rest?

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I hadn't thought of that. Perhaps I should have thanked him.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[jeffholton.livejournal.com]

Mmm. Perhaps.

Too bad I don't know him. I'd get him a t-shirt that says, "I'm not a bigot. I talked to some lesbians once."

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Someone else suggested I should have yelled, "HEY! STRAIGHT GUY!"

That would have been pretty funny, I think.

[jeffholton.livejournal.com]

How do you know he was straight?

Maybe he was a former female celibate asexual, nonpreferential, but not quite bi.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Hmmm. You're right.

DOWN WITH ASSUMPTIONS!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Oh my goodness, I should have TOTALLY yelled, "HEY STRAIGHT GUY!" I will have to try that next time and see what happens! (Hopefully I won't get shot.)

If you want to email me the picture of the outfit, that would be cool. Although now my mother is trying to get me to agree to let her take me shopping! SAVE ME!

[jeffholton.livejournal.com]

And now you're assuming there's something wrong with assumptions. Hmf.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Argh! I am trapped in your web of crazy logic!!

Here goes nothing...

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

You brought up so much good stuff it will be hard for me to cover it all!

But maybe starting off with the wedding would be too much? How about just little things around town?

The problem with the whole wedding thing is that it is so ingrained in me to think that "dressed up" = "dressed girly". I have gone to a few weddings in the past few years in clothes that were less girly (i.e. not skirts/dresses) and I felt really self-conscious like I was underdressed. I don't want to feel that way at the wedding.

I don't need to be the "strong" one or the "less emotional" one or anything, really, in comparison to Jen. And I know that even feminine women who are perceived as powerful women have their own set of assumptions cast upon them (frigid, cold-hearted, wants to be a man, etc.).

I guess the bottom line is that I don't know /exactly/ why being perceived as butch-femme bothers me so much, I only know that it does. It's not so much that I worry about being "the femme" (although that certainly plays a role, no offense to any hot femmes out there), it's that I don't like any time gender-specific roles are cast on me (even some that I may relate to).

A lot of it has to do with how I was raised. Keep in mind that I was raised by a single father with one brother, and my female influence was my grandmother. Aside from my grandmother trying to mold me into a good little homemaker, my father also had a number of double standards in his home because I was female. For example, I was expected to do a bulk of the household chores even though I was the youngest, including writing a grocery list for a family of three when I was a little girl. While my father let me play sports and wear boys' clothes, there was never any doubt that I was "the woman of the house" because I had a lot of household responsibilities.

Forgive me if I shy away from traditional societal expectations of femininity or balk away from "expected" gendered behavior. I can't help it. I grew up having gendered behavior not only forced upon me, but used against me by preventing me from doing other things that I wanted to do/be. I did not like being perceived as weaker, less intelligent, more emotional, more flighty, coy, and permiscuous just because I had a vagina, /especially/ not when I was an overachieving class valedictorian, most likely to succeed, level-headed, logical, athletic powerhouse. You know?

Wow. I sound quite bitter, and I don't usually feel this way. I've had quite a rough, exhausting night emotionally but wanted to get back to you anyway. I don't even know if i answered your questions.

Why not have people see you as femme-ish and then subvert the idea of what the femme is by not being stereotypically feminine, but still a girl in the appearance sense?

Because even if I had a "girlier" appearance (longer hair, say, or boob shirts), I still wouldn't be seen as femme-ish. Why? Because I'm not. Even in the frilliest of clothes I would look, at best, as a miserable tomboy.

On Saturday night, my mother's husband dragged out some old photo albums for Jen. There are a couple of Christmas photos in one of the albums where someone in my family purchased an outfit for me: grey button down shirt, red sweater vest, plaid pleated skirt with the giant saftey pin. Apparently I was required to try it on after I opened it, and I dutifully put on the clothes. Three photos were taken. You should have /seen/ the misery and discomfort on my face. It is priceless!

Jen couldn't stop laughing.

[jeffholton.livejournal.com]

Well, I need SOME way to get you in my clutches.

muuaaahahahahah.

Catching up on comments (sorry!)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

If i may ask a little further, as far as you are concerned at least, how tight of a connection exists between your aesthetics and reactions to social/political aspects and roles of gender, and sexual orientation?

Well, I think in a lot of ways every person's attractions are driven by their aesthetics, and I suppose this would be the case for straight or queer people. As my 7-year-old friend Tayler would say, "You like what you like, Mommy." And that's the way it goes.

I think there's definitely a difference between being aesthetically pleased by a person (ie recognizing the beauty in someone) and being sexually attracted to that person, but at the same time you can't have the sexual attraction without the aesthetics. There has to be SOMETHING drawing you to that person and wanting to be intimate, you know?

I find so many people attractive, even sexually attractive, and maybe I'm not the right person for this question because I definitely identify as pansexual rather than, say, a lesbian... but suffice it to say that I find a LOT of people aesthetically pleasing but only some of them in a sexual way. And most of those people that entice me on a sexual level are women - certain types of women, even.

Which is I guess what you were asking about in the first place, right? Ha ha! But I guess another compounding confusion lies in the fact that while I don't want to look stereotypically feminine, I happen to find a lot of stereotypically feminine people beautiful, but when push comes to shove, I like people that are hotter versions of me. Perhaps that's more narcissism than sexual orientation. :)

(Sorry it took me so long to answer.)

Catching up on comments...

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

1) In the hypothetical instance where an anonymous observer assigns gender roles to you and Jen, are you more uncomfortable with the fact it was assigned to you, or her?
Me, of course. Aside from the fact that I'm terribly egotistic, it's not really my place to become uncomfortable for her, you know? I mean, I know that /she/ is uncomfortable when things get assigned to her, and so in one sense I am uncomfortable because of her discomfort, but mainly I leave that up to her. If it didn't bother her, it wouldn't bother me. Similarly, I'd say that she only cares what people think of me when it affects me.

2) Do you worry that the 'femme' gender assignment will also carry a connotation of you having lesser authority/fortitude/personal power?
Oh dear god yes. You have to realize that outside of my online life (where people don't see/hear me), I am very rarely taken seriously or seen as a professional. One would think, given interactions with people in the professional world, that I were not a genius of a young person with a lot of experience and skills. Everyone treats me not only as a foolish girl, but as a foolish girl child. It's very frustrating. Dressing (and acting) less girly gives me a little bit more "street cred," because even if I'm still read as 5+ years younger than I am, I'm seen as tougher in some ways.

3) Are you worried about having someone make an assumption that you're inherently more submissive than Jen? Or in general that there is an inequity in your relationship?
I don't really care if /strangers/ make any sorts of assumptions about us, but I /do/ care about people, say, that I have to see on a daily basis (ie at work). I think that overall society has such an old-school idea of male-female relationships that has transferred into same-sex relationships (namely that one is "the girl" and one is "the man"), and I don't really want to entertain the possibility that anyone would look at us and try to figure out who is "the man" (although I know they probably already do).

4) Did you give any thought to the perceptions of those familiar with you, instead of those who are making assumptions on initial snapshot perceptions? Do you worry that those who know you may have a change in their overall opinion of you personally should you tend towards the feminine more frequently?
People that know me know that I'm pretty fluid with gender stuff, including outward gender expression - and they treat me the same way regardless EXCEPT for some members of my extended family. The one perception that might change is that SOME people who know me might become concerned that a change in my outward expression is less about what I want and more about what Jen wants. Since she is, and always will be, butch-identified, I can see some people expecting me to change to fit the picture of a partner THEY would expect for her (given stereotypes and her past dating history).

5) Is there something specific that makes being perceived as more of a boychick more comfortable/acceptable than being perceived as a 'girl'? One thing that gets under your skin more than the rest?
It's more comfortable for me to be androgynous-looking because it allows for me to be read both ways depending on what I want. There are days when I absolutely want to be read as male, and if I girl my appearance up some more, I would lose that flexibility.

Re: Catching up on comments (sorry!)

[skiadaimonos.livejournal.com]

Heheheh
That was all very cool to read.
Thank you :)

Re: Catching up on comments (sorry!)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

You are quite welcome. :)