Literary Character Identification
Jul. 1st, 2004 09:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
judecorp(Wow, I wasn't expecting the smoking one to be so popular. Go friends list!) ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
cathboblet suggested that I write about the imaginary character (novels, poetry, film, tv etc) you most identify with, and which others would least suspect. I don't know if others will least suspect it or not, so I do hope that my beloved Cath will forgive me if, in fact, it's suspected and I blew the second part. Please give me partial credit, Ms. Cath, because I think you're adorable and wonderful and all of that, and no, I'm not sucking up to the teachermuch.
I've often related very strongly to Dean Moriarty in On the Road (Jack Kerouac). I know I've given the book to many a significant person in my life, and no one else seems to like it as much as I do, which is perfectly fine. But part of my giving the book to those who have held the strongest places in my heart is to give them a little peek into my impression of my personage, a little guidebook. Also, an apology. In advance.
To say that Dean Moriarty is the "bad guy" in the story is largely accurate, at least in the loosest emotional definitions of bad. To say that Dean Moriarty is a bit of a hero in the story is also largely true. And that, I suppose, is how I identify strongly - the faulted angel. Do I have good intentions? Of course. Do I often muck things up along the way when my personal faults impede said intentions? More times than I care to admit. Does that stop me from trying and screwing up again? Unfortunately not.
Dean had a lust for life, an intense aura, a likable personality, tremendous energy, and a vicious brain. He fell in love fast, loved hard, and burned out quickly. He was easily distractible. He sired bastard children and broke hearts with unintentional lapses of attention. He ruined people as quickly as they were drawn to him. Those "who knew better" hated him on sight, those with broken hearts cursed his name, but all were potentially under his spell. Underneath it all, I think he was a scared kid with too much love inside that he didn't know how to use properly. Emotional supernova.
Do I think I'm that destructive? Of course not. But I see my patterns of relating, my erratic running around, flitting to social events and cavorting with masses on the internet as my own personal trip on the highways of life. I want to be liked, I have a vivacious personality, and people are drawn to me. I'd be lying if I didn't tell you I love it, because of course I do. Yet I wear myself too thin, form too many friendships and often worry about letting people down, not doing enough, not being enough. I love hard, form tight relationships, and get overwhelmed. I have a strong pull to run, even when things are good, /especially/ when things are good.
Jen often tells me that I have a negative view of myself in relationships, and she's correct. She says she worries that someday I will leave her not because I am unhappy, but because I think I'm bad for her. She's correct again - if I were to run away, my own emotions would likely not be the reason. Like Dean, I'm addicted to that rush of connection and intense emotion, and I've been trying to learn the appreciation of the slow burn and the smoldering embers. I think I'm more successful than he was, but that's only because I've learned the consequences through his example in the 30+ times I've read the story of those he touched.
It's really just a good thing I've never met anyone quite like me, because I would hate to think of the destruction we would cultivate, the havoc we would cause, in each other.
You are an SRCL--Sober Rational Constructive Leader. This makes you an Ayn Rand ideal. Taggart? Roark? Galt? You are all of these. You were born to lead. You may not be particularly exciting, but you have a strange charisma--born of intellect and personal drive--that people begin to notice when they have been around you a while. You don't like to compromise, but you recognize when you have to.
You care absolutely nothing what other people think, and this somehow attracts people to you. Treat them well, use them wisely, and ascend to your rightful rank.
Take it yourself.
cathboblet suggested that I write about the imaginary character (novels, poetry, film, tv etc) you most identify with, and which others would least suspect. I don't know if others will least suspect it or not, so I do hope that my beloved Cath will forgive me if, in fact, it's suspected and I blew the second part. Please give me partial credit, Ms. Cath, because I think you're adorable and wonderful and all of that, and no, I'm not sucking up to the teacherI've often related very strongly to Dean Moriarty in On the Road (Jack Kerouac). I know I've given the book to many a significant person in my life, and no one else seems to like it as much as I do, which is perfectly fine. But part of my giving the book to those who have held the strongest places in my heart is to give them a little peek into my impression of my personage, a little guidebook. Also, an apology. In advance.
To say that Dean Moriarty is the "bad guy" in the story is largely accurate, at least in the loosest emotional definitions of bad. To say that Dean Moriarty is a bit of a hero in the story is also largely true. And that, I suppose, is how I identify strongly - the faulted angel. Do I have good intentions? Of course. Do I often muck things up along the way when my personal faults impede said intentions? More times than I care to admit. Does that stop me from trying and screwing up again? Unfortunately not.
Dean had a lust for life, an intense aura, a likable personality, tremendous energy, and a vicious brain. He fell in love fast, loved hard, and burned out quickly. He was easily distractible. He sired bastard children and broke hearts with unintentional lapses of attention. He ruined people as quickly as they were drawn to him. Those "who knew better" hated him on sight, those with broken hearts cursed his name, but all were potentially under his spell. Underneath it all, I think he was a scared kid with too much love inside that he didn't know how to use properly. Emotional supernova.
Do I think I'm that destructive? Of course not. But I see my patterns of relating, my erratic running around, flitting to social events and cavorting with masses on the internet as my own personal trip on the highways of life. I want to be liked, I have a vivacious personality, and people are drawn to me. I'd be lying if I didn't tell you I love it, because of course I do. Yet I wear myself too thin, form too many friendships and often worry about letting people down, not doing enough, not being enough. I love hard, form tight relationships, and get overwhelmed. I have a strong pull to run, even when things are good, /especially/ when things are good.
Jen often tells me that I have a negative view of myself in relationships, and she's correct. She says she worries that someday I will leave her not because I am unhappy, but because I think I'm bad for her. She's correct again - if I were to run away, my own emotions would likely not be the reason. Like Dean, I'm addicted to that rush of connection and intense emotion, and I've been trying to learn the appreciation of the slow burn and the smoldering embers. I think I'm more successful than he was, but that's only because I've learned the consequences through his example in the 30+ times I've read the story of those he touched.
It's really just a good thing I've never met anyone quite like me, because I would hate to think of the destruction we would cultivate, the havoc we would cause, in each other.
You are an SRCL--Sober Rational Constructive Leader. This makes you an Ayn Rand ideal. Taggart? Roark? Galt? You are all of these. You were born to lead. You may not be particularly exciting, but you have a strange charisma--born of intellect and personal drive--that people begin to notice when they have been around you a while. You don't like to compromise, but you recognize when you have to.
You care absolutely nothing what other people think, and this somehow attracts people to you. Treat them well, use them wisely, and ascend to your rightful rank.
Take it yourself.
