The most infuriating phone call ever.
Sep. 21st, 2004 06:53 pmI just received the most infuriating phone call of my life, I think.
A little backstory: last Wednesday, I received a voicemail from the person I interviewed with at AAC saying that she wanted to speak to me. No details. I called her back and she was already gone for the day, so I left her a message. I received no call back, so I called her on Friday and left another message. I called yesterday and left another message. I called today and left yet another message, although this one had a bit of an "If you want to talk to me you're going to have to meet me halfway and return my call" overtone.
So a few minutes ago she calls me back (finally!) and says that she had a very difficult time in the hiring process, and I didn't get hired and all of that blahblah, and she asks if she can give me some feedback. Now at this point I should have just said no, but I really am genuinely interested in being a better professional so I agreed. And I wish I hadn't, because it really was the most awkward conversation of bullcrap I have ever had. And it was obviously awkward on her end, too, because she said 'umm' about 874387984 times and was speaking in this pained monotone.
So anyway, she proceeds to tell me that she 'really really was pulling to hire me' because I 'did a great job on the roleplays and answering all the questions' but that she absolutely couldn't hire me because she had two red flags during my interview. The first red flag is kind of comical, really, because the situation was so obviously sarcastic... she was asking the usual question about interoffice conflict and I mentioned the whole situation last year when Coworker Sarah was training me, and her work stalker went all ballistic about it and was calling me a 'friendstealer' all over the office. When the team asked if I confronted her about it, I said no. At the time, I was discouraged from doing so from both Coworker Sarah and my Supervisor because it would 'make it worse.' At some point I made some flippant, joking comment about how I dealt with it by "talking about her behind her back," which now I suppose I realize I should have never done even though it was obviously humor and and I even said, "just kidding." But so this woman on the phone tells me all about how I would be bad for office morale, basically. This is really a laughable statement, though, because as anyone who has ever worked with me can attest, I practically have Team Spirit coming out my ass at work and I'm always going above and beyond for my coworkers. So, whatever.
And then comes the part that REALLY pissed me off. At some point in the interview we started talking about my work at the homeless shelter (I think we were talking about harm reduction) and I mentioned that some of the social workers (myself included) had some problems with the way the shelters were being run and the overarching philosophy (definitely NOT harm reduction) of the upper administration. Now I don't know exactly what I said about this during the interview, but I know that at one point I mentioned that I was always e-mailing our Director about things I thought needed to be changed at FM, like some of the more "outspoken" preachers and about how some of the churches were preying on homeless people and would offer them free rides to their churches but would keep them out of the shelter during meal times and not feeding them meals. I talked about how we were always frustrated in supervision because of FM policy of people losing their beds if they were intoxicated, even if they weren't being disruptive, and how we encouraged people not to use but wouldn't 'report' people, either. It's rather personal to me, and I know I went to great lengths to talk about how much I loved working at FM even though I hated the administration, and how I continued to work in the system and really got a reputation of being a pit bull because I was always bringing complaints to the Director and my supervisor.
During my "feedback," the woman tells me that her biggest concern about me was how I told the hiring team that I was "blatantly disregarding" policies at FM because I didn't agree with them. I didn't know what to say. I was stunned, and I am still stunned. I know for a fact that I never said anything about blatantly disregarding any policies, and was quite adamant about how we were always trying to get our supervisor to be our liaison to upper management about changing policies and nothing ever came of it. And I pointed out that it was obvious that upper management wasn't interested in changing policies, as evidenced by the decision to lay off all of the case managers because we were "enabling the homeless."
At that point, I thanked her for her feedback and told her that I was very sorry for any miscommunication we may have had, because I certainly did not think I had ever given any sort of impression that I or any of my colleagues blatantly disregarded any work policies. I told her that many of us took our concerns both to upper management and to our immediate supervisor in order to find a better way to serve our clients, and I told her that there were many policies that I did not agree with but I followed to the letter (like when we weren't allowed to have a "Halloween" party so we had to have a "Fall Harvest" party) because I am a professional who is committed to her workplace.
And then I told her that I was sorry she had some misunderstandings about me, but that I was glad that she and her team had found a suitable candidate and that I hope it worked out for them. And as I was trying to gracefully get off the phone, she proceeded to go on /again/ about "how much she really wanted to hire me." At that point I just wanted to say, "Stop blowing fucking sunshine up my ass, lady, because I'm not buying it. I realize you're trying to make yourself feel better here, but I honestly don't know what the point of this phone call was outside of pissing me off." She even went so far as to say that she hoped that someday I found a position where she would have an opportunity to run into me again. What the fuck ever, lady.
Maybe in her mind, she thought she was somehow helping me (or her organization) by letting me know about problems she had with me. Maybe in her mind she had genuine concerns about some of the things I said during the interview. But I think if she was /so/ enamored with me and wanted to hire me /soooo/ badly, she would maybe have tried to clarify some of these 'concerns' while we were interviewing. Especially since fruitless workplace confrontation is apparently valued highly at AAC.
Okay, it was weird enough when they filled the interview with ROLEPLAYS, but calling me back with interview FEEDBACK is even weirder. Was this a job interview, or Social Work Practice Lab?
A little backstory: last Wednesday, I received a voicemail from the person I interviewed with at AAC saying that she wanted to speak to me. No details. I called her back and she was already gone for the day, so I left her a message. I received no call back, so I called her on Friday and left another message. I called yesterday and left another message. I called today and left yet another message, although this one had a bit of an "If you want to talk to me you're going to have to meet me halfway and return my call" overtone.
So a few minutes ago she calls me back (finally!) and says that she had a very difficult time in the hiring process, and I didn't get hired and all of that blahblah, and she asks if she can give me some feedback. Now at this point I should have just said no, but I really am genuinely interested in being a better professional so I agreed. And I wish I hadn't, because it really was the most awkward conversation of bullcrap I have ever had. And it was obviously awkward on her end, too, because she said 'umm' about 874387984 times and was speaking in this pained monotone.
So anyway, she proceeds to tell me that she 'really really was pulling to hire me' because I 'did a great job on the roleplays and answering all the questions' but that she absolutely couldn't hire me because she had two red flags during my interview. The first red flag is kind of comical, really, because the situation was so obviously sarcastic... she was asking the usual question about interoffice conflict and I mentioned the whole situation last year when Coworker Sarah was training me, and her work stalker went all ballistic about it and was calling me a 'friendstealer' all over the office. When the team asked if I confronted her about it, I said no. At the time, I was discouraged from doing so from both Coworker Sarah and my Supervisor because it would 'make it worse.' At some point I made some flippant, joking comment about how I dealt with it by "talking about her behind her back," which now I suppose I realize I should have never done even though it was obviously humor and and I even said, "just kidding." But so this woman on the phone tells me all about how I would be bad for office morale, basically. This is really a laughable statement, though, because as anyone who has ever worked with me can attest, I practically have Team Spirit coming out my ass at work and I'm always going above and beyond for my coworkers. So, whatever.
And then comes the part that REALLY pissed me off. At some point in the interview we started talking about my work at the homeless shelter (I think we were talking about harm reduction) and I mentioned that some of the social workers (myself included) had some problems with the way the shelters were being run and the overarching philosophy (definitely NOT harm reduction) of the upper administration. Now I don't know exactly what I said about this during the interview, but I know that at one point I mentioned that I was always e-mailing our Director about things I thought needed to be changed at FM, like some of the more "outspoken" preachers and about how some of the churches were preying on homeless people and would offer them free rides to their churches but would keep them out of the shelter during meal times and not feeding them meals. I talked about how we were always frustrated in supervision because of FM policy of people losing their beds if they were intoxicated, even if they weren't being disruptive, and how we encouraged people not to use but wouldn't 'report' people, either. It's rather personal to me, and I know I went to great lengths to talk about how much I loved working at FM even though I hated the administration, and how I continued to work in the system and really got a reputation of being a pit bull because I was always bringing complaints to the Director and my supervisor.
During my "feedback," the woman tells me that her biggest concern about me was how I told the hiring team that I was "blatantly disregarding" policies at FM because I didn't agree with them. I didn't know what to say. I was stunned, and I am still stunned. I know for a fact that I never said anything about blatantly disregarding any policies, and was quite adamant about how we were always trying to get our supervisor to be our liaison to upper management about changing policies and nothing ever came of it. And I pointed out that it was obvious that upper management wasn't interested in changing policies, as evidenced by the decision to lay off all of the case managers because we were "enabling the homeless."
At that point, I thanked her for her feedback and told her that I was very sorry for any miscommunication we may have had, because I certainly did not think I had ever given any sort of impression that I or any of my colleagues blatantly disregarded any work policies. I told her that many of us took our concerns both to upper management and to our immediate supervisor in order to find a better way to serve our clients, and I told her that there were many policies that I did not agree with but I followed to the letter (like when we weren't allowed to have a "Halloween" party so we had to have a "Fall Harvest" party) because I am a professional who is committed to her workplace.
And then I told her that I was sorry she had some misunderstandings about me, but that I was glad that she and her team had found a suitable candidate and that I hope it worked out for them. And as I was trying to gracefully get off the phone, she proceeded to go on /again/ about "how much she really wanted to hire me." At that point I just wanted to say, "Stop blowing fucking sunshine up my ass, lady, because I'm not buying it. I realize you're trying to make yourself feel better here, but I honestly don't know what the point of this phone call was outside of pissing me off." She even went so far as to say that she hoped that someday I found a position where she would have an opportunity to run into me again. What the fuck ever, lady.
Maybe in her mind, she thought she was somehow helping me (or her organization) by letting me know about problems she had with me. Maybe in her mind she had genuine concerns about some of the things I said during the interview. But I think if she was /so/ enamored with me and wanted to hire me /soooo/ badly, she would maybe have tried to clarify some of these 'concerns' while we were interviewing. Especially since fruitless workplace confrontation is apparently valued highly at AAC.
Okay, it was weird enough when they filled the interview with ROLEPLAYS, but calling me back with interview FEEDBACK is even weirder. Was this a job interview, or Social Work Practice Lab?
no subject
Date: 2004-09-21 11:04 pm (UTC)off topic: have you uploaded pics yet?
no subject
Date: 2004-09-21 11:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-21 11:26 pm (UTC)The lady has boundary issues to be sure. No matter what kind of organization she works for I guarantee there's nothing in her job description that says she has to "save" everyone she meets from what she perceives to be their flaws. That's a personal choice, and wow, she must be wiped out from trying to save everyone from themselves.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-21 11:26 pm (UTC)http://share.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=EeAtGbZo3aNXjA
(Sorry that they are blurry. I had to use digital zoom and no flash.)
no subject
Date: 2004-09-21 11:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-21 11:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 12:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 12:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 12:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 12:53 am (UTC)I don't think feedback is that useful; so often when someone isn't hired after an interview, it's because either there was someone else even better, or you just rubbed an interviewer the wrong way, or you obviously didn't know your ass from your elbow. None of which are especially useful to be told.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 02:17 am (UTC)i'm honestly glad you didn't get that job... would you want her for a co-worker?
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Date: 2004-09-22 03:17 am (UTC)Somehow I don't think the "I really wanted to hire you if you didn't suck so bad" left handed compliment I got was either kind /or/ constructive.
I wish she'd never called. I especially wish she'd never said that I make a habit of blatantly disregarding work policy. With all the crap I/we put up with at FM with Eric, I take serious offense to that.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 03:18 am (UTC)Unless you mean something like, "Shampoo is bettah!" Because you're right - I should have said that.
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Date: 2004-09-22 03:19 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 03:21 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 03:23 am (UTC)Ugh.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 03:26 am (UTC)It was SO unexpected! I seriously thought she was going to offer me suggestions based on the techniques I showed during my roleplays. That was the kind of feedback I was expecting. I was totally blindsided!
no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 03:26 am (UTC)You want that I should beat her up?
Date: 2004-09-22 03:26 pm (UTC)And I think at work you should create topless tuesdays. That sounds like a good way to blatantly disregard the rules.
love mike
Re: You want that I should beat her up?
Date: 2004-09-24 01:38 am (UTC)I think it would certainly spice up the field of Early Intervention! ;)
no subject
Date: 2004-09-25 04:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-25 07:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-25 08:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-25 08:32 pm (UTC)