Road Map

[judecorp]

Why is it that there are no easy solutions in life? Really, I just want a self-titled Book of Answers that could dictate my life. Or an accurate road map. Whatever.

When you get right down to it, the only definites in my life are that I want to spend it with my Jennifer and I would like it to involve children. Our children. Ideally I would like to do this in a house, but when push comes to shove, give me the baby and the house is optional. Higher up on the options list is a queer community in which we can raise our child(ren). That's not to say that we want to surround ourselves with a commune of queer mamas and drag the bambinos to 8709327427 pride parades, but it is definitely important to us that we raise our family somewhere that we can walk down the street as a family without causing a scene or inciting violence.

It's just all so frustrating, because we just go back and forth in discussions about our life together and there is just no simple path. To be able to afford children here, we would need to move someplace cheaper, like a suburb like or Quincy or Malden or Melrose, or heck, even further out. And that's great and all, rent-wise, but the beautiful lez-beans of Beantown congregate around the lovely JP or the schwank Davis Square. And I can say with all certainty that unless Divine Intervention happens, we cannot afford to live in either of these places and hope to spawn. Le suck.

It's all just so ridiculous and stressful. To think that we were in a better mindset and position to have children two years ago. Unbelievable.

Comments

[anitsirk.livejournal.com]

it's all about living on the outskirts of pioneer valley- houses in easthampton are totally affordable. that was northampton is right down the road, but you're not *there all the time*.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Well yeah, I look at housing listings for Easthampton and other surrounding areas all the time. No really, ALL THE TIME. (I am a bit obsessive. I have the MLS for the area bookmarked.)

The job market there's not stellar, though... so we'd either have to have at least one of us have a job first, move into an apartment, and then house-hunt; or go out there without jobs and hope we find jobs quickly, while dwindling our house-buying savings; or something. So it's like this: try to find jobs there (which we are doing currently) and someday maybe one of us will get lucky? Or just go out there and take our chances? (That's what we did here, ugh.)

We talk about this all the freaking time, if you hadn't noticed. :)

[bellabooks.livejournal.com]

"I just want a self-titled Book of Answers that could dictate my life."

LOL - When I was looking for a job, I joked that I needed job listings like:
1. Jen: This is the job that you will have the most fun with, but with low pay and the benefits suck;
2. Jen: This is the job that you will hate, but you will reach all of your life goals quickly; and
3. Jen: This is the job you want. It's right down the middle.

As for your house hunting, I think that you should buy a 2 family home in Somerville. You can rent 1/2 of it to your nice friends, Jen & Olex, and we can all march toward babyland together.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

While that would be a simply lovely plan, and I would very much like to rent a beautiful apartment in Somerville to my lovely friends Jen and Olex, there is not a bank in hell that would pony up the $500K or more for us to by a two-family house with our household income.

There's not even such a bank in the trailer parks and strip malls of hell.

[jadefu.livejournal.com]

Call me if you want to plan a work day to come out and meet some of my coworkers. I have a few people in mind that have lots of connections and might be good for job leads.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Oooh, really? 'Cause my schedule is such that I can pretty much take off any Friday without too much effort.

What kind of people with what kind of leads? You're the best ever.

(We've schemed that if we secure jobs and move out there, we can cram into a 1BR for a while and put stuff in storage so we can save moolah on rent while we househunt!)

[gimmeapony.livejournal.com]

I read the MLS for JP every day too. And check craigslist. I don't even know WHY. I've done the math and, though I'm confident we could get the loan we need, there's no way in hell that we could afford the monthly payments. It makes me want to cryyyy. And I don't even want to have babies.

[jadefu.livejournal.com]

I know it's harder for Jen to get time off (pesky retail), but I've got some art-related contacts for her. I have sneak in some phone calls when I get a few minutes at work.

I was thinking of one of our underwriters, who knows lots of businesses, might have some good suggestions, but also another coworker in Membership who works with major gifts and knows lots of people. And I need to call my therapist, who a licsw....she might know someone too.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I am so thrilled that you would do this sort of legwork for us. I really appreciate it. Anything that you could possibly do would be awesome, but if you can't - no sweat! We just adore you and want to come visit you again soon.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Dude, you are SO buying a condo in the next couple of months. I can feel it.

[carina-s.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's just not simple. I hate that.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Me too.