Legally blonde.

There are some crazy kids in my youth group. My goodness. Today I went to take the youth to the movies with a co-volunteer I had never met before, David, who ended up being a totally cool guy (and, get this, a rocket scientist). So we go to the movies, but the movie we were going to see sold out after one youth got a ticket. So the rest of us had to see Scary Movie 2 (ugh) and then had to wait like 40 minutes for Josh to get out of the other movie.

At 10:30 or so, when we're about to close, Josh comes back inside to say that his car won't start. We go outside, and sure enough, it won't turn over, won't do anything. Being the babydyke with 2 gay boys, I look over the car. They insist that it needs to be jumped (though the lights and radio come on, I mean, DUH boys) so they get the jumper cables and do that. It doesn't work. Josh calls AAA and arranges for them to tow him to a garage, where his sister will pick him up.

AAA comes at 11:40 or so. Josh says, "I am such a dummy. The car wouldn't start because I had it in 'drive'."

HA HA HA HA HA HA. He will NEVER live that down. No. At least I had interesting conversation with David the computer and astrophysics nerd who, as usual, was a positively adorable gay boy.

He had it in drive.

Geeze.

Sometimes I don't know what I prefer to be.

Well, that was interesting. I'll keep this brief, because I don't want to be to sort of person who just dumps and dumps and dumps her heart out in LJs. But I suppose I need to say /something/.

A., the spouse, is a classic avoider. He won't talk about something unpleasant unless you make him. This has been a constant struggle between us, as I am a talker. I don't like having to push and push and push and push for information I should be privvy to, like the condition of his ailing father, like his feelings for me. You know, little things like that.

Today, with much coaxing, I got him to basically admit that he's not in love with me anymore. I knew it was the truth, but still, it feels a little funny having it out in the open. He seemed sad about it. I'm sure he regrets feeling the way he does. His words echoed a lot of my feelings - he gave his word, isn't he breaking promises? Etc.

Weirdness. His next sentence? "I want to go see Final Fantasy today."

Okay.

Gas leaks are no fun.

I have such a headache right now. There has got to be a gas leak. Whenever we use the oven, it reeks of gas in here. No good. Must call landlord on Monday. Yuck-o. Brownies in the oven though. Brownies = good. A. must know I'm bummed. He's been on this big diet so it's a big deal for him to make brownies.

After we had 'the talk', I had an interesting conversation with Mark. We chew each other up on the phone. He described it best - we play the cobra and the mongoose all the time. Someday, we're going to have a nice conversation. He says, 'Definitely, even if it means we have to be silent.'

I guess the plan, Stan, is to wait out this year. We're both pretty dependent on each other financially right now while I finish the MSW and he gets his web developer certificate thinger. See what things are like next spring. If it's still the same, I'm likely off to the City to let her swallow me whole.

I was smiling about it earlier. Now I think the weight of it is settling. Sometimes saying something out loud, even if you already knew it, is twice as sad.

If I were...

if i were a stone, i would be... snowflake obsidian
if i were a tree, i would be... a star magnolia
if i were a bird, i would be... a crow
if i were an insect, i would be... a lightning bug
if i were a machine, i would be... a synthesizer
if i were a tool, i would be... pliers
if i were a fruit, i would be... cherries
if i were a flower, i would be... a stargazer lily
if i were a kind of weather, i would be... partly cloudy
if i were a mythical creature, i would be... a chimera
if i were a musical instrument, i would be... a whole handbell choir
if i were a kind of profession, i would be... social work
if i were an animal, i would be... Piglet from Winnie the Pooh
if i were anything in the world, i would be... Jude
if i were a color, i would be... midnight blue Crayola
if i were a fragrance, i would be... sandalwood
if i were an emotion, i would be... care
if i were a state or feeling, i would be... concern
if i were a vegetable, i would be... corn on the cob
if i were a sound, i would be... a cappella music
if i were an element, i would be... neon