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judecorpToday I got to thinking about junior high and high school, probably because I was still mulling over the interaction I had at Whitehall, and the conversation I had with Emmy last night.
In my junior high/high school experience, there were two 'known' lesbians, and in stereotypical fashion, they were the girls' PE teacher and the girls' softball coach. Mary Lou (gym teacher) and Nina (softball) were not at all out about their sexuality, this is all information we came across later. There were two other suspected lesbians, Ms. Turcotte and Ms. Tessier, who were also involved in softball but were an english teacher and a guidance counselor. They lived together though, hence the rumors.
When we were on the school softball team, Nina would take my friend (and teammate) Laurie and I out with her. We would go to movies with her (probably once a month), and occasional trips to Burger King and stuff like that. If we had to be at school on a weekend for something, she would always offer to pick us up. She never took anyone else from the team out. Eventually, we hung out with her so much that we became friends with a girl our age (Marsha) who lived next door to Nina.
At the time, when I was in the middle of it, it never struck me how inappropriate that was, for an adult in a school setting to hang out with students after school. We just thought Nina was really cool and we liked riding in her van, going to movies, and having a goofy old time. Laurie and I probably did this through 8th and 9th grade.
The weirdest thing now, I think, is that out of everyone I know in my class (MSC 1993), the only certifiable girl-loving girls are me and Laurie. But neither of us really thought so at the time - we were both chasing boys with the rest of the girls in the class. Heck, Laurie got married a year before me and separated a year before me - and I remember the phone calls right after she and Mark broke up. "Did you ever kiss a girl?" "Like, really kiss a girl?" "Did you ever do more than kiss a girl?" etc. Hee. Get me the toaster!
So, I wonder, did Nina know? Did we know? We never talked about it, it was just the "she must be, she's the softball coach and kind of butch" stuff. Nina didn't even come out to Laurie until after they kissed on a drunken New Years' Eve 2 years ago, when we were long since graduated.
It's just odd, and I was pontificating.
In my junior high/high school experience, there were two 'known' lesbians, and in stereotypical fashion, they were the girls' PE teacher and the girls' softball coach. Mary Lou (gym teacher) and Nina (softball) were not at all out about their sexuality, this is all information we came across later. There were two other suspected lesbians, Ms. Turcotte and Ms. Tessier, who were also involved in softball but were an english teacher and a guidance counselor. They lived together though, hence the rumors.
When we were on the school softball team, Nina would take my friend (and teammate) Laurie and I out with her. We would go to movies with her (probably once a month), and occasional trips to Burger King and stuff like that. If we had to be at school on a weekend for something, she would always offer to pick us up. She never took anyone else from the team out. Eventually, we hung out with her so much that we became friends with a girl our age (Marsha) who lived next door to Nina.
At the time, when I was in the middle of it, it never struck me how inappropriate that was, for an adult in a school setting to hang out with students after school. We just thought Nina was really cool and we liked riding in her van, going to movies, and having a goofy old time. Laurie and I probably did this through 8th and 9th grade.
The weirdest thing now, I think, is that out of everyone I know in my class (MSC 1993), the only certifiable girl-loving girls are me and Laurie. But neither of us really thought so at the time - we were both chasing boys with the rest of the girls in the class. Heck, Laurie got married a year before me and separated a year before me - and I remember the phone calls right after she and Mark broke up. "Did you ever kiss a girl?" "Like, really kiss a girl?" "Did you ever do more than kiss a girl?" etc. Hee. Get me the toaster!
So, I wonder, did Nina know? Did we know? We never talked about it, it was just the "she must be, she's the softball coach and kind of butch" stuff. Nina didn't even come out to Laurie until after they kissed on a drunken New Years' Eve 2 years ago, when we were long since graduated.
It's just odd, and I was pontificating.
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Date: 2002-05-24 09:45 am (UTC)In all seriousness, though, I think we have connections to one another, beyond conscious realms. It makes sense.
Summer before I went to college.
Date: 2002-05-24 10:45 am (UTC)I was also very much buying in to the stereotypical definition of feminine beauty. I had long hair. I wore make up. I mean, you saw my prom picture. That picture was taken at the very beginning of that summer.
And I remember that while I was sorta kinda maybe seeing this jock track star, I was putting pressure on my boss to give me shifts where I could work with two particular girls. I knew that they were "suspected" lesbians. But I had lots of fun talking to them. And I felt very comfortable around them, despite my het-girl act. If someone would have asked me to search my heart and consider being a lesbian, I think that I would have said "No, I'm not. That's just not me. I find it interesting. But, no. I'm straight."
So, I think that your other comment here is correct. We, at some level, know these things without consciously KNOWING them. I know that there were signs that I was a dyke LONG before I realized it, and MUCH before I realized that I *liked* that part of me.
I dunno. We're weird like that.
Chemical clues maybe?
Date: 2002-05-24 11:29 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2002-05-24 11:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-05-24 01:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-05-31 10:12 pm (UTC)