Circle, circle, dot, dot. Now you've had your cooties shot.

[judecorp]

You know what I hate about myself? I hate that I swallow things down and push them back until they get to me so badly that I just melt down. And I hate that the person who gets the meltdown is probably the last person that ever should.

Basically, I just hate losing control, period. Between the accident, getting slammed at work, trying to get holiday things done, and the bitter realization that I could have lost someone very special, I guess I'm more than a little frayed around the edges. I guess I need a little more than I'm letting on.

Today I'm thankful to Jennifer, for putting up with me even in her hardest times, and Jodie, for calling this afternoon to ask if I am okay.

Love.

Comments

[mythicalbeast.livejournal.com]

Frustrating and annoying beyond words how the people that we are most likely to lash out at are the ones least likely to deserve it. These are the ones that if anything provide the support we need to keep going when all else around is collapsing and when our own structure wavers - they feel it. Having done nothing to deserve it, everything to mean they should never see the negative half of it. Yet they are there at the only moments we feel we can or must crack-fracture-break-snap with emotional responses good or bad.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Absolutely.

It seems that we deem that certain people are "safe" to be honest and real in front of, and those people bear the brunt of so many emotions ~ I wonder if by making them "safe" for us, we're making them "unsafe" for them?

Is it worth the gamble?

[mythicalbeast.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure there is an option on that gamble.
Perhaps there is, and it involves hugging yourself with the aid of straps for a long time.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

While I like hugging, and I like myself, I think I'll pass. :)

You hug me instead. :)

[kieron.livejournal.com]

I am thankful for Jodie.