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judecorpI'm back at work. Bummer. I had a wonderful weekend, the second in a row of wonderful, fun-filled weekends. This, of course, means that I have to cram several weeks of holiday stuff (shopping, cards, tree, parties, planning) into one whirlwind of a week. Don't be surprised if I seem frantic for the next 10 or so days.
In lieu of a weekend wrap-up, I thought perhaps it would be better to share with all of you the email I just sent to my mother. I've never written anything quite like this to her.
Hello, Mom!
I hope that your trip home was uneventful and quick even though you lost your trashy romance novel. If I find it, I will wrap it up for you and bring it home on the 21st. There are a few things I would have liked to have said in person, but time and situation didn't necessarily allow for it (and besides, mushy words might ruin my image). We don't spend a lot of time speaking in an emotional way, it seems, unless those emotions are negative. I'd like for that to change, but I'm sure that takes time.
I'm really glad that you had a chance to come out and visit. You probably noticed that this visit was a little different than the one you made in 2000 when Aaron and I had just moved here. I hope that everything was comfortable and enjoyable. Know that you can come back anytime, you just need to bring cat treats now that the monsters have come to expect it. Ralph says, "Bring trees."
I've been thinking back to last year at this time and how horrible our interaction was at the restaurant. I think that on my short list of regrets, that afternoon certainly rates highly. It perpetually amazes me how one year can be so challenging and the next can be so calm. I still feel terrible about that afternoon, but I'm glad that we had several days this weekend that were nothing like that. I hope it's something that never happens again.
I'm very glad that you got a chance to meet my Jennifer and spend some time getting to know her even a little bit. If you find her just a fraction as amazing as I do, then things went well. She's renewed a sort of hope in me that I thought was dead a long time ago, and I'm thrilled to have been able to share a bit of that with you. I admit to being nervous about the whole meeting scenario, but things went more smoothly than I imagined and I am so grateful. She is family to me, and there are enough rifts in the family already, so this was important to me. I realize that the situation and our relationship may not be easy for you, and I appreciate your effort in the past year.
I'm also pleased that you had a chance to meet some of my very best friends. My life would not be nearly as full without them, nor as enjoyable. They, far more than money, are the reason I stayed in Columbus instead of coming home after graduation. I wanted you to meet them so you could understand why. It's been so long since I felt like an integral part of something big and beautiful, and I have been so blessed here with such a remarkable and eclectic group of people who both enhance and challenge so many different parts of me. I'm sure you can see little glimmers of each of them in me and in my smile. They are all such incredible people and I am honored to know them and experience them.
I know that it's hard when people you love are so far away. I know that when you see someone sporadically it seems as though there are drastic changes that occur outside of your reach. You see me in snapshots of holidays and brief visits, Polaroids of growth, and everything must seem so different from the person you remember seeing a year ago. Trust that the person I am now is the person I once was, the happier person who is true to herself and confident in that self. Trust that the person in Columbus who is loved by so many people is the person you helped to form so many years ago. What seems like a drastic depart from the past six years is in actuality a coming home to myself.
I could babble on and on at this point (a trait I'm sure I acquired from you), but I think I will simply say thank you, quietly and sweetly, for taking the time to meet the myriad of people that I love, the woman I share my life with, and the place that brings it all together. I appreciate it.
Love,
Jude
Thanks to everyone who made the weekend great. Now it's back to the grind.
In lieu of a weekend wrap-up, I thought perhaps it would be better to share with all of you the email I just sent to my mother. I've never written anything quite like this to her.
Hello, Mom!
I hope that your trip home was uneventful and quick even though you lost your trashy romance novel. If I find it, I will wrap it up for you and bring it home on the 21st. There are a few things I would have liked to have said in person, but time and situation didn't necessarily allow for it (and besides, mushy words might ruin my image). We don't spend a lot of time speaking in an emotional way, it seems, unless those emotions are negative. I'd like for that to change, but I'm sure that takes time.
I'm really glad that you had a chance to come out and visit. You probably noticed that this visit was a little different than the one you made in 2000 when Aaron and I had just moved here. I hope that everything was comfortable and enjoyable. Know that you can come back anytime, you just need to bring cat treats now that the monsters have come to expect it. Ralph says, "Bring trees."
I've been thinking back to last year at this time and how horrible our interaction was at the restaurant. I think that on my short list of regrets, that afternoon certainly rates highly. It perpetually amazes me how one year can be so challenging and the next can be so calm. I still feel terrible about that afternoon, but I'm glad that we had several days this weekend that were nothing like that. I hope it's something that never happens again.
I'm very glad that you got a chance to meet my Jennifer and spend some time getting to know her even a little bit. If you find her just a fraction as amazing as I do, then things went well. She's renewed a sort of hope in me that I thought was dead a long time ago, and I'm thrilled to have been able to share a bit of that with you. I admit to being nervous about the whole meeting scenario, but things went more smoothly than I imagined and I am so grateful. She is family to me, and there are enough rifts in the family already, so this was important to me. I realize that the situation and our relationship may not be easy for you, and I appreciate your effort in the past year.
I'm also pleased that you had a chance to meet some of my very best friends. My life would not be nearly as full without them, nor as enjoyable. They, far more than money, are the reason I stayed in Columbus instead of coming home after graduation. I wanted you to meet them so you could understand why. It's been so long since I felt like an integral part of something big and beautiful, and I have been so blessed here with such a remarkable and eclectic group of people who both enhance and challenge so many different parts of me. I'm sure you can see little glimmers of each of them in me and in my smile. They are all such incredible people and I am honored to know them and experience them.
I know that it's hard when people you love are so far away. I know that when you see someone sporadically it seems as though there are drastic changes that occur outside of your reach. You see me in snapshots of holidays and brief visits, Polaroids of growth, and everything must seem so different from the person you remember seeing a year ago. Trust that the person I am now is the person I once was, the happier person who is true to herself and confident in that self. Trust that the person in Columbus who is loved by so many people is the person you helped to form so many years ago. What seems like a drastic depart from the past six years is in actuality a coming home to myself.
I could babble on and on at this point (a trait I'm sure I acquired from you), but I think I will simply say thank you, quietly and sweetly, for taking the time to meet the myriad of people that I love, the woman I share my life with, and the place that brings it all together. I appreciate it.
Love,
Jude
Thanks to everyone who made the weekend great. Now it's back to the grind.
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no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 10:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 01:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 10:25 am (UTC)no subject
no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 10:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 01:39 pm (UTC)Thanks for sharing!
Re: Thanks for sharing!
Date: 2002-12-09 01:39 pm (UTC)Re: Thanks for sharing!
Date: 2002-12-10 06:13 am (UTC)Re: Thanks for sharing!
Date: 2002-12-10 06:34 am (UTC)Re: Thanks for sharing!
Date: 2002-12-10 06:46 am (UTC)Re: Thanks for sharing!
Date: 2002-12-10 08:33 am (UTC)Sorry for the rant
Date: 2002-12-10 08:42 am (UTC)Re: Sorry for the rant
Date: 2002-12-10 08:55 am (UTC)(Nothing bad, of course.)
Rant away!
Re: Sorry for the rant
Date: 2002-12-10 09:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 01:15 pm (UTC)I really liked this part. It rings really true to me...
no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 01:43 pm (UTC)Still, for me, college and graduate school have proven to be my most formative years, and it must all seem very bizarre and abrupt to my family. I grew up a lot from 0 to 17, but at least as much from 17 to 27.
no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 04:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-09 04:10 pm (UTC)*hug*
no subject
Date: 2002-12-10 01:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-10 07:40 pm (UTC)