Schoolyard Jingles:

[judecorp]

I'm Popeye the Sailor Man!
I live in a frying pan.
I turned on the gas, and I burned my ass.
I'm Popeye the Sailor Man!

~//~

Yes, Jesus hates you!
Yes, Jesus hates you!
Yes, Jesus hates you!
He told me so himself.

~//~

Tell me some of yours. :)

Comments

[grrlpower.livejournal.com]

miss mary had a steamboat
the steamboat had a bell
miss mary went to heaven,
the steamboat went to ...

hello operator
please give me number 9
and if you disconnect me
I'll kick you from..

behind the yellow curtain
there was a piece of glass
miss mary sat upon it
and cut her big fat..

ask me no more questions
I'll tell you no more lies
the boys are in the bathroom
doing up their..

flies are in the kitchen
bees are in the park
boys and girls are kissing
in the D-A-R-K dark dark dark.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Miss Susie had a baby
She named him Tiny Tim
She put him in the bathtub
To see if he could swim
He drank up all the water
He ate up all the soap
He tried to eat the bathtub
But it wouldn't go down his throat!

It's been 15+ years...

[vorpalbla.livejournal.com]

But it's amazing how clearly I remember that one now that you mention it.

I wonder who actually comes up with these things. A 7-year-old might recite them, but I can't see a 7-year-old actually writing them.

The one I heard was almost the same, except for "And if you disconnect me/I'll kick you in the" etc.

[laughingsal.livejournal.com]

Happy birthday to you
You live in the zoo
You look like a monkey
You smell like one too

and...

[laughingsal.livejournal.com]

Deck the halls with gasoline!
Light a match and watch it gleam.
Watch the school burn down to ashes
Aren't you glad you played with matches?

[juliann.livejournal.com]

On top of Old Smokey
All covered with sand
I shot my poor teacher
With a red rubber band
You couldn't have missed her
She's 40 feet wide
I shot her with courage
I shot her with pride
I went to her funeral
I went to her grave
Instead of some flowers
Brought handgrenades

***

On top of spaghetti
All covered with cheese
I lost my poor meatball
When somebody sneezed
It rolled off the table
And onto the floor
And then my poor meatball
Rolled out of the door
It rolled in the garden
And under a bush
And then my poor meatball
Was nothing but mush

(I have forgotten the second verse!)

***

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school
We have tortured every teacher, we have broken every rule
We're out to get the principal tomorrow after school
Us kids are marching on!

Glory, glory hallelujah
Teacher hit me with a ruler
I came through the door with a loaded fourty-four
And she ain't my teacher no more!

(Who says kids are subjected to more violence now?? BTW my father says that in his day it was "I bopped on the bean with a rotten tangerine" so the shooting must've happened betwen the 50s and the late 70s ;) )

I also know really long camp songs but they have their own tunes...

[crushinator.livejournal.com]

heh. beat me to the punch. I was thinking the same thing about the violence.

[crushinator.livejournal.com]

My eyes have seen the glory
of the burning of the school
we have tortured all the teachers
we have broken all the rules
we have shot the secretary
and we hung the principal

Our troops are marching on
(marching on)

Glory glory halleluja
teacher hit me with a ruler
I met her at the bank
with a U.S. army tank
and she ain't my teacher no more
(not no more)

Glory glory halleluja
teacher hit me with a ruler
I hid behind the door
with a loaded .44
and she ain't my teacher no more
(not no more)

also

[crushinator.livejournal.com]

From the halls of French Run school
to the shores of bubble-gum bay
we will fight our class room battles
with spitballs, gum, and clay
first we fight for lunch and recess
and to keep our desks a mess
and be sure to tell the principal
that our teachers are the best...
pests!

Many more.

[communista.livejournal.com]

The other day
(The other day)
I met a bear
(I met a bear)
A great big bear
(A great big bear)
A way up there
(A way up there)

The other day I met a bear, a great big bear a way
up there.

I looked at him...
He looked at me...
I sized him up, he sized up me.

He said to me, why don't you run...
I see you ain't got any gun.

And so I ran,
Away from there.
And right behind,
Me was that bear...

And then I saw ahead of me, a great big tree
Oh, Lordy me.

The nearest branch, was ten feet up
I'd have to jump, and trust to luck...

And so I jumped into the air...
I missed that branch a way up there

Now don't you fret, and don't you frown
Cause I caught that branch, On the way back down...

That's all there is, there ain't no more...
Unless I meet that bear once more.

I'm full of 'em!

[communista.livejournal.com]

Oh, an Austrian went yodeling on a mountaintop high
When along came an avalanche interrupting his cry

Oh, dear-ie, O-der-rock-ke-keery
O-der-reock-koo-koo (WHOOSH.. sound of avalanche)
O-der-rock-ke-keery
O-der-reock-koo-koo (WHOOSH.. sound of avalanche)
O-der-rock-ke-keery
O-der-reock-koo-koo (WHOOSH.. sound of avalanche)
O-der-rock-ke-keery -O....

An Austrian went yodeling on a mountaintop high
When along came a grizzly bear interrupting his cry

Oh, dear-ie, O-der-rock-ke-keery
O-der-reock-koo-koo (WHOOSH.. sound of avalanche) and (GRRR!.. sound of grizzly)
O-der-rock-ke-keery
O-der-reock-koo-koo (WHOOSH.. sound of avalanche) and (GRRR!.. sound of grizzly)
O-der-rock-ke-keery
O-der-reock-koo-koo (WHOOSH.. sound of avalanche) and (GRRR!.. sound of grizzly)
O-der-rock-ke-keery -O

(Next verses, keep adding on - (WHOOSH, GRRR!, WOOF-WOOF....)

Verse #3: St. Bernard (woof-woof)

Verse #4: Dairy Cow (moooooo)

Verse #5: Milking Maid (squirt-squirt)

Verse #7: Pretty Girl (Yooo-hooo!)

[tool2deftones.livejournal.com]

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the kings horses and all the kings men
Couldn't put Humpty together again

I am little teapot, short and stout.
This is my handle and this is my spout.
When the water is boiling, hear me shout,
Pick me up and pour me out!


Found a peanut, found a peanut,
Found a peanut just now,
Just now I found a peanut,
Found a peanut just now.

Cracked it open, cracked it open,
Cracked it open just now,
Just now I cracked it open,
Cracked it open just now.

It was rotten, it was rotten,
It was rotten just now,
Just now it was rotten,
It was rotten just now.

Ate it anyway, ate it anyway,
Ate it anyway just now,
Just now I ate it anyway,
Ate it anyway just now.

Got a stomach ache, got a stomach ache,
Got a stomach ache just now,
Just now I got a stomach ache,
Got a stomach ache just now.

Called the doctor, called the doctor,
Called the doctor just now,
Just now I called the doctor,
Called the doctor just now.

Penicillin, penicillin,
Penicillin just now,
Just now I took penicillin,
Penicillin just now.

Operation, operation,
Operation just now,
Just now an operation,
An operation just now.

Died anyway, died anyway,
Died anyway just now,
Just now I died anyway,
Died anyway just now.

Went to heaven, went to heaven,
Went to heaven just now,
Just now I went to heaven,
Went to heaven just now.

Wouldn't take me, wouldn't take me,
Wouldn't take me just now,
Just now Heaven wouldn't take me,
Wouldn't take me just now.

Went the other way, went the other way,
Went the other way just now,
Just now I went the other way,
Went the other way just now.

Didn't want me, didn't want me,
Didn't want me just now,
Just now they didn't want me,
Didn't want me just now.

Was a dream, was a dream,
Was a dream just now,
Just now it was a dream,
Was a dream, just now.

Then I woke up, then I woke up,
Then I woke up just now,
Just now I woke up,
I woke up just now.

Found a peanut, found a peanut,
Found a peanut just now,
Just now I found a peanut,
Found a peanut just now.

Rain rain go away
Come again another day
Little children want to play
Rain rain go away
Come again another day.

One two, buckle my shoes
Three four, shut the door
Five six, pick up the sticks
Seven eight, lay them straight
Nine ten, a big fat hen.

Jack and Jill, went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water
Jack fell down and broke his crown
And Jill came tumbling after.

Hickory, Dickory, Dock,
The mouse ran up the clock.
The clock struck one,
The mouse was gone,
Hickory, Dickory, Dock.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Found a Peanut is one of my favorites. :)

Ha!

[donewithyou.livejournal.com]

I was singing My Sister just last night. :)

Re: Ha!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

It's a great song! :)

[mythicalbeast.livejournal.com]

Don't you laugh when the hearse goes by
for you may be the next to die
They wrap you up in a clean white sheet
and lower you down six feet deep!
The worms crawl in and the worms crawl out,
the worms play peanucle on your snout!

--,--

Great Green Globs of Slimely greasy Gopher Guts
Mutilated monkey Meat, Chopped up Baby Parakeet,
all wrapped up with itty bitty birdy feet,
YUM YUM don't forget to lick the spoon!

[grrlpower.livejournal.com]

Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts
mutiliated monkey meat, decapitated doggies feet
french-fried onions swimming in a pool of blood
and I forgot my spoon
on the moon
in a bucket of snot
but I got a STRAAAAAAAWW :oD

[drainbead.livejournal.com]

This land is my land,
it isn't your land.
I've got a shotgun,
and you ain't got one.
I'll blow your head off
if you don't get off.
This land is Private Property!

[grrlpower.livejournal.com]

early one day
in the middle of the night
two dead men got up to fight
back to back they faced each other
drew their swords and shot each other
the blind man saw it
the deaf man heard it
and the paraplegic man ran to get the police.

[mooglegrl.livejournal.com]

Tic tac toe
Three in a row
Barney got shot by a G.I. Joe
Mama called the doctor
and the doctor said,
'Whoop! Barney's dead!'
I said a 'Whoop! Barney's dead!'
'Whoop! Barney's dead!' (repeat for as long as necessary)

A more graphic favorite

[mooglegrl.livejournal.com]

Joy to the world!
The teacher's dead!
We bar-be-qued her head!
What happened to her body?
We flushed it down the potty!
And Heaven and Nature screamed!
And Heaven and Nature screamed!
And Hea-ven Heaven and Nature screamed!

There might be more, but I forget it.

[osuptygal.livejournal.com]

Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack
all dressed in black, black, black
with silver buttons, buttons, buttons
all down her back, back, back

she asked her mother, mother, mother
for 15 cents, cents, cents
to see the elephants, elephants, elephants
all jump the fence, fence, fence

[osuptygal.livejournal.com]

mama's in the kitchen burnin' rice,
daddy's in the backyard shootin' that dice
brother's in the jailhouse raisin' hell
sisters on the front porch sellin' fruit cocktail

rockin' robin, tweet..tweedelee
rockin' robin, tweet, tweedelee

Lincoln, Lincoln I've been thinkin'
WHAT in the world have you been drinkin'
smells like whiskey tastes like wine
OH MY GOD IT'S TURPENTINE!

rockin' robin...
(the rest is a blur)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

You kill me!

Oh, you should never taunt the camp counselor...

[pica-nc.livejournal.com]

Black
socks
the longer you wear them
the longer you wear them
the blacker they get

Sometimes
I
think I must wash them
But something keeps telling me
not yet, not yet

*******
(To the tune of Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory...)

I wear my pink pajamas in the summer when it's hot
and I wear my flannel nighty in the winter when it's not
but sometimes in the spring time
and sometimes in the fall
I jump between the sheets with
NOTHING ON AT ALL!

Lordy, Lordy Alleluia!
Balmy breezes blowing through 'ya
I'm laying in my bed, o, what's it to ya?
WITH NOTHING ON AT ALL

******
My dad used to sing this to me; it's from a Mad magazine... same tune

"The Hymn of the Battered Republic"

Mine eye's have seen the glory of a nation gone to pot
where the loonies cary handguns and the passerbys get shot
where the villians rule our country and the cities burn and rot
The Glory Days are Gone!

Lordy, lordy why'd we do it? Now we have to suffer through it, had our chance but really blew it, the Glory Days are Gone!

***********

Thank you for this stroll down memory lane :)

Re: Oh, you should never taunt the camp counselor...

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

When I was a camp counselor, I liked "Pink Pajamas" a lot. But my favorite (when I worked with the 11-13 year old girls) was:

I know a weenie man, he owns a weenie stand
He sells most everything from hot dogs on down
Someday, I'll join his life
I'll be his weenie wife
Hot dog! I love my weenie man!

or

Er-eet went the little green frog one day
er-eet went the little green frog
er-eet went the little green frog one day
er-eet, er-eet, er-eet-eet-eet

Honk honk went the big Mack truck one day
ker-splat went the little green frog
his eyes won't go er-eet anymore
cause they got eaten up by a dog!

[cathboblet.livejournal.com]

Quick quick! The cat's been sick.
Hasten, hasten, fetch a basin.
Too late, too late, it's all in vain,
the cat has licked it up again.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Cath, you're from England, right?

Us crazy American kids would never sing something about a basin.

<3 Cath <3

[cappucinogrrl.livejournal.com]

My mother, your mother live across the street.
18, 19 Mulberry Street.
Every night they have a fight and this is what they say:
Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider!
Girls go to Mars to be movie(super) stars!

Down by the banks with the hanky panky
where the bull frogs jump from bank to banky
with an eep, opp, eep opp opp
skittle, diddle, kerplop!

The littlest worm
(the littlest worm)
I ever saw
(I ever saw)
Was stuck inside
(Was stuck inside)
My soda straw.
(My soda straw.)
The littlest worm I ever saw, (I ever saw) was stuck inside my soda straw.

He said to me
(He said to me)
Don't take a sip.
(Don't take a sip.)
For it you do
(For if you do)
I'll surely slip.
(I'll surely slip)
He said to me don't take a sip (don't take a sip!) for if you do, I'll surely slip.

I took a sip
(I took a sip)
And he went down.
(And he went down.)
Right through my pipes
(Right through my pipes)
He must've drowned!
(He must've drowned!)
I took a sip and he went down, (and he went down) right through my pipes he must have drowned.

I coughed him up
(I coughed him up)
And he was dead
(And he was dead)
I buried him
(I buried him)
In Mommy's bed
(In Mommy's bed)
I coughed him and he was dead, I buried him in Mommy's bed.

He was my pal
He was my friend
But now this song has reached an end.

[lemur68.livejournal.com]

I don't know 90% of these jingles.

Even as a child I was going on 50.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I can sing them for you if you'd like. And bring you a walker.

[saldemonium.livejournal.com]

Doesn't make a whole lot of sense near the end, but we never cared. =)

Joy to the world,
The school burnt down,
And all the teachers fried.
The principal is dead,
I shot him in the head,
And flushed him down the john,
And flushed him down the john,
And flushed, and flushed, him down the john.

[cappucinogrrl.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah.

Operation, rehabilitation. Operation, this is how you play.
First you take a bowling bowl, then you roll it down the hole.
Hit your cat, make him splat. Ohhhhh...

Operation rehabilitation. Operation, this is how you play.
Next you take a baseball bat, pitchers glove and your hat
hit your dad, make him mad, ohhhh...
....

I'm Chiquita Banana and I'm here to say
Want to get rid of your teacher the easy way?
Take a banana, put the peel on the floor,
and then watch your teacher slide out of the door.

I know there were so many more.

I wish I could remember all of the ones we jump roped to.
I know there was "Strawberry Shortcake, cream on top, tell me the name of your sweetheart. Is it A? B?" etc.

[rizzo41.livejournal.com]

Teacher's meeting has begun, no more laughing, no more fun.
If you show your teeth or tongue you'll have to pay a forfeit.
And the forfeit is...

Or my favorite, that I didn't hear until you taught it to me..

Michael, Michael Motorcycle, turn the key and watch him pee.

And then of course, the politically incorrect one involving squinting your eyes up and then exposing yourself..

Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees, look at THESE!

Ahhh.. children

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees, look at THESE!

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA OMFG I forgot all about that one!

How about: (with hand motions, I'll have to show you sometime)

Nice girls sit like this (fingers together)
Pretty girls sit like this (fingers crossed)
But girls who sit like this (fingers apart)
Get this (middle finger)
Like this (snap)

[down-to-one.livejournal.com]

hello mother, hello father,
here we are at camp marijuana,
coke is good here,
crack is better,
im so fukked up i can hardly write this letter