"You've been bothering your mother for a long time."

[judecorp]

I just got my hair cut (well, trimmed, if you want to be specific) at the walk-in place (Great Clips) near my house. I've never had the same stylist twice, and today was no exception. This drippingly gay man called my name and he was incredibly chatty... the sort of chatty where the person talks incredibly fast and just fires questions at you. He really was a whirlwind of conversation, and the talk was entirely hysterical. At one point he asked me what I did for work, and I said I was a social worker. He said, "Yep, you look like a social worker." (What does a social worker look like?) But the best part of the conversation was when we started talking about piercings - nipple piercings in particular. He mentioned that at one time he had his nipples pierced, but it made him uncomfortable because when he would "be in those places where you take your shirt off," people would assume he was into, "you know, that sort of scene where you'd be dragging me around by 'em." (I'm assuming he's talking about BDSM here, but I just nodded a lot.) So we have this exchange:

Me: Yeah, I used to have one of my nipples pierced. It started really bugging me and was growing out, so when I took it out for an MRI, I never put it back in.

Him: Yeah, I took mine out, too, since I wasn't, you know, using them.

Me: Mostly, it was great for bothering my mother.

Him: Honey, I bet you've been bothering your mother for a /long/ time!

Me: (fake innocent look) What do you mean?

Him: Well, let's just say that I've been bothering my mother for a long time, too.

Holy crap, I almost peed in the barber chair. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! At that moment, I guessed what "looking like a social worker" meant.

Comments

[thatpatti.livejournal.com]

that is hysterical!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I love going to that Great Clips. The people are always so obnoxious and hysterical! :)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_epiphany_girl_/]

I love it! That's hilarious! I love gay men. :)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Old gay men are even better. This guy was in his 60s, and I could have just eaten him up with a spoon.

[elspazz0.livejournal.com]

i dont get it.

oh wait, are you gay or something?

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

What's gay?

[elspazz0.livejournal.com]

this icon?

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

You are so right.

[laughingsal.livejournal.com]

I know you get me all hot and bothered.

(Sorry I haven't congratulated you yet. I was hoping to do it in person, but things have been crazy lately. :(.)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

It's okay. :) I just want to see you soooooon.

[oddharmonic.livejournal.com]

That's hysterical! It makes me want to go out and get my hair cut (which I haven't in months because split ends seem to be at bay and Himself is cheap) because I miss the older lady that used to cut mine at my local Great Clips. She told me that the key to a job at the local Wal-Mart was to be 17 and dress like a strumpet last tiem I was there. (:

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

HA! I think you should dress like a strumpet and go back in there.

[nikongirln70.livejournal.com]

when he would "be in those places where you take your shirt off," people would assume he was into, "you know, that sort of scene where you'd be dragging me around by 'em."

hahahah. thats probably what my parents would think.sometimes i wonder what they would say if they saw me naked one day. I AM NOT THE SWEET INNOCENT GIRL YOU THOUGHT I WAS!!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

*gasp* You're NOT??!?!