Do I concern myself with others too much?
Aug. 27th, 2001 05:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
judecorpGood question.
The shrink commented that I spent about 90% of my session talking about Aaron's situation, his feelings, his concerns. 10% about myself, how I was doing, my plans. Why is this? I've spent a good part of the afternoon thinking about this.
Is it easier for me to be concerned about someone else rather than myself? Absolutely. But I think it's also that I currently have no closure. My dad asked me if I thought A. had a girlfriend (I'm pretty positive he doesn't). I wish he did! That would make SENSE! That, I could understand. Okay, he doesn't want to be with me because he likes someone else. But instead, he just doesn't like me. For no reason. Or reasons that don't seem to make sense, like that I wouldn't let him take me canoeing after I almost got killed that one time in 1996. Or that I "would never let him be the strong one." Or any of the other completely random things I've gotten out of him. You know what? I'm tired of trying to pull information out. I am tired of being pliers.
The shrink says that I should have exploded on him the night I was angry. He says that maybe A. would have exploded back and had some sort of catharsis. But then he says that I should concentrate more on me. So what's going on?
A little background - I have been taking care of people my whole life. I think I take good care of myself. But how would I concentrate MORE on me? Any suggestions? (Seriously here, I'm dead serious.) Should I spend my sessions talking about the karate smurf and the pretty princess? I think I have a good handle on that. I don't, however, have a handle on this relationship with no closure. Bah!
Soon I will be with the parentals. And then NY. With Robert Sean Leonard. And Jodie. And Princess. And EVERYONE. Yay.
The shrink commented that I spent about 90% of my session talking about Aaron's situation, his feelings, his concerns. 10% about myself, how I was doing, my plans. Why is this? I've spent a good part of the afternoon thinking about this.
Is it easier for me to be concerned about someone else rather than myself? Absolutely. But I think it's also that I currently have no closure. My dad asked me if I thought A. had a girlfriend (I'm pretty positive he doesn't). I wish he did! That would make SENSE! That, I could understand. Okay, he doesn't want to be with me because he likes someone else. But instead, he just doesn't like me. For no reason. Or reasons that don't seem to make sense, like that I wouldn't let him take me canoeing after I almost got killed that one time in 1996. Or that I "would never let him be the strong one." Or any of the other completely random things I've gotten out of him. You know what? I'm tired of trying to pull information out. I am tired of being pliers.
The shrink says that I should have exploded on him the night I was angry. He says that maybe A. would have exploded back and had some sort of catharsis. But then he says that I should concentrate more on me. So what's going on?
A little background - I have been taking care of people my whole life. I think I take good care of myself. But how would I concentrate MORE on me? Any suggestions? (Seriously here, I'm dead serious.) Should I spend my sessions talking about the karate smurf and the pretty princess? I think I have a good handle on that. I don't, however, have a handle on this relationship with no closure. Bah!
Soon I will be with the parentals. And then NY. With Robert Sean Leonard. And Jodie. And Princess. And EVERYONE. Yay.
