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Jan. 10th, 2004 11:34 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
judecorpI feel like I haven't gone out in ages. I mean, I go to the movies, and I go out to dinner, but I don't really go out and be social. The last time I went out for real was when I went to that bar in Chelsea to have a mini-reunion with some people I went to college with. Before that was I don't even know when. It's frustrating, because I used to go out all the time. I remember a time when it was not uncommon for me to go out to several places with different people, and make plans after plans. It was kind of nice, especially because when I have down-time I tend to fill it with malaise.
Daina called to see if I/we wanted to go to Summit for the Camp Sunrise fundraiser. I was all kinds of excited about it because Jen and I went last year and had a really good time, and I ended up running into a whole bunch of people that I hadn't seen in a long time - people I knew from Big Gay Work or from other random things. It has been so freaking long since I did anything social in the community - probably Pride, I'm guessing - and I miss it. I don't really have any desire to be one of those people that clubs all the time, or only goes to queer spaces, but once in six months is not enough. So I asked Steve (who was with us) and Jen, and they both said they wanted to go. I made the mistake of anticipating it, though, because first Steve told me he was only kidding about wanting to go, and then Jen said she didn't want to go either. I tried to call Daina a couple of times to see if she was there, because I would have gone by myself and met her there, but she didn't answer her phone. So here I am. 11:30 on a weekend night and I'll probably go to bed soon. Like last night. And last weekend.
I am starting to become one of those people who whines in journals. I'm an emo bitch. Yay. Maybe I just perpetually wish I was on vacation. Maybe I need to find that "vacation space" in my head so I can tap into it on regular occasions.
Today I went through my health insurance company online to check the names of some counselors I know. (Well, not know /personally/, but know by reputation.) Next step is to find my policy and see what all is covered, so I don't get screwed with an enormous bill. And then... to make the calls.
Something needs to change soon. And not just this damned weather.
Daina called to see if I/we wanted to go to Summit for the Camp Sunrise fundraiser. I was all kinds of excited about it because Jen and I went last year and had a really good time, and I ended up running into a whole bunch of people that I hadn't seen in a long time - people I knew from Big Gay Work or from other random things. It has been so freaking long since I did anything social in the community - probably Pride, I'm guessing - and I miss it. I don't really have any desire to be one of those people that clubs all the time, or only goes to queer spaces, but once in six months is not enough. So I asked Steve (who was with us) and Jen, and they both said they wanted to go. I made the mistake of anticipating it, though, because first Steve told me he was only kidding about wanting to go, and then Jen said she didn't want to go either. I tried to call Daina a couple of times to see if she was there, because I would have gone by myself and met her there, but she didn't answer her phone. So here I am. 11:30 on a weekend night and I'll probably go to bed soon. Like last night. And last weekend.
I am starting to become one of those people who whines in journals. I'm an emo bitch. Yay. Maybe I just perpetually wish I was on vacation. Maybe I need to find that "vacation space" in my head so I can tap into it on regular occasions.
Today I went through my health insurance company online to check the names of some counselors I know. (Well, not know /personally/, but know by reputation.) Next step is to find my policy and see what all is covered, so I don't get screwed with an enormous bill. And then... to make the calls.
Something needs to change soon. And not just this damned weather.
