Susie Homemaker? Hey, it could happen!

[judecorp]

So far today, I have already folded a load of laundry and put laundry away. I removed the sheets from the bed, washed them, and they are currently spinning happily in the dryer. I've emptied the dishwasher, put the dishes away, and refilled with dishes from the sink. I've got a chili percolating merrily in the crock pot after spending time peeling, chopping, and generally having a good time. (Hopefully it tastes good, I've never made chili before and I also took out the meat.)

Soon I'm going to run to Target to pick up a few things and maybe grab something from the Starbucks counter while I'm there. That will involve purging the car of snow. By the time that's done, it will be time to take the sheets out of the dryer and put them back on the bed. After that's all made up, I'll probably watch a little television while I write a couple of reports for work, or maybe read a little bit more of American Psycho. Perhaps a floor sweep is in order.

The sun is out and it and the heat from the inside are melting the snow on the skylights, resulting in spontaneous artistry on the walls. There are cats dozing on the sofa, curled into little kitty donuts. Soon the house will fill with the aroma of tomatoes and chili powder, and then it will be time to make the cornbread and shred the cheese.

On days like this, I think that I really /could/ pull this off full time. If only there was money. And babies.

Comments

[exoteris.livejournal.com]

I love you.
I will give you babies.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Are you going to steal them from the mall?

[mostlyhere.livejournal.com]

I know what you mean. I want nothing more in life than to be able to afford to be a stay at home dad.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

So here's my plan: You, me, and the Jens all move to Western Mass and buy a place together - an old farmhouse with land. The Jens work full-time, and we work part-time and stay home with babies. I'll work in the morning, you work in the afternoon. We provide all our own child care.

What do you say?

[exoteris.livejournal.com]

I will provide fresh babies. I will smuggle them in from the mall.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Excellent. Make sure to only smuggle CUTE ones.

[mostlyhere.livejournal.com]

I'm there!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

YES!!

[mostlyhere.livejournal.com]

And Jen likes it too! Except she thinks that you should get your farm house and we should move into your guestroom while we build a house. Far enough away that we can have screaming loud sex, but close enough that you and I could see eachother from the back porches. That way as our children get older they can walk all the way to Auntie Jude's house by themselves (while we can still watch out for them)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Well okay, we can have two houses, that would be just fine. :) As long as there was visiting and kidwatching and drinks on the porches in the summer. Because really, that would be wonderful.

Coupla things

[keelamonster.livejournal.com]

Come to my house and do most of those things. Seriously, I will pay you money.

No, wait. That's all. So only the one thing.

Re: Coupla things

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

So do Jen and I get a place to live out of the deal? And would it cause a Reppie scandal if I was your houseboy?

Re: Coupla things

[keelamonster.livejournal.com]

Sure!
And wouldn't that be a delicious scandal?
It's too bad you're not here illegally. :)

Re: Coupla things

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I could throw away my birth certificate if it would help with the scandal. I do have a Latino name, after all. ;)

Tell me when and we're totally moving in!

[geniusorafool.livejournal.com]

Woot! I already put tonight's dinner together, made tomorrow's lunches, cleaned the fishtanks, and have done some paperwork at my desk. Yay for productivity!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

See, if I didn't have to work I would be sooooo productive. I really am a work MACHINE during the day, and it's nice to pour that work into my house and family instead of work.

Although I do like getting checks.

[folkyboy.livejournal.com]

you read American Psycho? that totally doesn't seem like your type of book.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I'm reading it right now. Why do you think it's not my "type of book"? What do you think my type of book is? I'm so curious now.

I love Bret Easton Ellis. I really enjoyed Less Than Zero and I'm loving this, too. I'm curious to see how the book differs from the movie, because I love the film American Psycho. I love the way Ellis so truly and brilliantly portrays the 80s yuppie mentality.

[kjtoo.livejournal.com]

I counted twenty-four homeless people today.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Hee.

Thanks so much for the books. I already finished Me Talk Pretty One Day. You are the best!

Stay-at-home Mom needs escape hatch

[cranapril.livejournal.com]

You made cleaning your house sound fun... but I'm so sick of laundry, and dishes, and picking up after messy boys and troublesome dog. I've even gotten to the point where I'm tired of grocery shopping and making dinner and planning meals.

And the turtle tank is getting scary with all the algae growing in it.

I'm searching for ways to get OUT of my house: tennis lessons, or a book club, or a knitting class. SOMETHING. ANYTHING where I wouldn't be interrupted by someone needing their bottom wiped.

But my spouse works all the time, and several weekends a month... and finding time for mom to even take a shower is a luxury.

Enjoy your job: interacting with kids, and handing them back to mom when you're done.

Re: Stay-at-home Mom needs escape hatch

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Perhaps it's a bit of a "grass is greener" phenomenon... because really, I'd much rather be pouring my time and energy, and my developmental know-how, into my own children instead of 30 or so children that belong to other people. Sure, my job is amusing and it's certainly nice with some of my children to hand them back because they're incredibly demanding, but I really feel like I'd much rather be pouring all of that work into raising my own little midgets.

And you should definitely find some sort of activity where you get out and interact with adults. Can you join a gym where they also have childcare or something? Then you could meet lots of adults! :)

Cleaning my house is fun because it's my day off. I'm sure if cleaning my house was my FT job I would find things to complain about. Instead it's my FT job after I already do a FT job. Ugh.

Now I'm off to make cornbread!

Re: Stay-at-home Mom needs escape hatch

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

And I get sick of cleaning and grocery shopping and planning meals and picking up after people, too. The only difference is that I only get to do all of that crap /after/ working 50+ hours/week.

Yuck.

[vorpalbla.livejournal.com]

"maybe read a little bit more of American Psycho"

Is it as good as the movie?

[kjtoo.livejournal.com]

Personally, I think it's better. When I picked it for my (now defunct) book club a while back, several people admitted to skimming in certain sections because Bateman is so focused on the superficial. Personally, I gobbled it all up like butter mints. Two and a half pages describing Bateman's facial-cleansing regiment? Bring it on! It's hilariously absurd.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Umm, isn't Bateman's focus on the superficial kind of THE POINT? Silly people! :)

I'm loving it!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I agree with kjtoo. I think it's better. One of the things I loved about the movie was the monotone monologues delivered by Bateman to describe everything from his shaving routine to the new Go-Go's record. And the book not only makes these blurbs longer, there are more of them. Ellis makes Bateman describe every piece of clothing worn by every individual he meets. It's fascinating.

I loved the movie because of it's accurate portrayal of 80s materialism with a little bit of fun 80s pop culture tossed in. The book really makes it that much sharper. I'm enjoying it.

[vorpalbla.livejournal.com]

Given Bateman's character way back in the 80's, why were people referencing "metrosexuals" recently as if it were a brand new phenomenon?

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Perhaps only the term is new? Because you're right, his beauty regimen would certainly rival any current metrosexual. Maybe it's the overemphasis on "masculinity" that is different than the metros?