Me, Myself, and My Friends
Feb. 28th, 2006 09:28 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
The other really interesting thing Jen and I talked about was about friendships and relationships, and how they affect us. She said that I haven't really been myself the whole time we've been in Boston, and I totally agree. Ryan and I were talking about how I didn't want to go to Game Night and he said, "What? You don't want to go to a party? You are the life of the party!" And it totally bummed me out because it used to be so true.
Jen told me that she is happy and gets to see the Real Me when we're with work people or people from the HelpLine. And I'm inclined to agree. I feel most like myself - my most likeable, funloving self - with people from work and the HelpLine... almost as good as with my soulfriends in Columbus. I just feel like I can be myself, like who myself is is appreciated, like I have some sort of value or merit or zing. It's nice.
I used to think that I'm happier at work than at home because things were really messed up at home. But the more I think about it, and the more Jen talks about it, the more I realize that the interactions I have at work - in a similar place and from a standpoint of genuinely wanting to get to know me and care about what's going on - help me tap into that genuine-ness and spirit of who I am. And of /course/ that makes me happy - I get to be me! I get to prank and be rude and inappropriate and people like it and feed off it and we all have a crazy time. It's good.
We talked a little bit, too, on what makes a good friend and what I, specifically, look for and need in good friendships. I mentioned when Coworker S had a family tragedy and she had to rush out of town, and how I called her every night to check up on her, even for a minute. I am that kind of friend because I /want/ that kind of friend. Maybe it's from spending my time with social service workers. Who knows? All I know is I have high standards, and I became accustomed to being blessed with an unusually large number of such quality friendships. And I sure do miss that.
I'm touched that she cares enough to think about me and my well-being, but I'm more touched that she pays attention and really notices. She's a keeper.
Jen told me that she is happy and gets to see the Real Me when we're with work people or people from the HelpLine. And I'm inclined to agree. I feel most like myself - my most likeable, funloving self - with people from work and the HelpLine... almost as good as with my soulfriends in Columbus. I just feel like I can be myself, like who myself is is appreciated, like I have some sort of value or merit or zing. It's nice.
I used to think that I'm happier at work than at home because things were really messed up at home. But the more I think about it, and the more Jen talks about it, the more I realize that the interactions I have at work - in a similar place and from a standpoint of genuinely wanting to get to know me and care about what's going on - help me tap into that genuine-ness and spirit of who I am. And of /course/ that makes me happy - I get to be me! I get to prank and be rude and inappropriate and people like it and feed off it and we all have a crazy time. It's good.
We talked a little bit, too, on what makes a good friend and what I, specifically, look for and need in good friendships. I mentioned when Coworker S had a family tragedy and she had to rush out of town, and how I called her every night to check up on her, even for a minute. I am that kind of friend because I /want/ that kind of friend. Maybe it's from spending my time with social service workers. Who knows? All I know is I have high standards, and I became accustomed to being blessed with an unusually large number of such quality friendships. And I sure do miss that.
I'm touched that she cares enough to think about me and my well-being, but I'm more touched that she pays attention and really notices. She's a keeper.