A few thoughts on love
Sep. 5th, 2006 08:19 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
judecorpI am so restless and anxious for us to move on to the next stage in our lives and our life together. It's been nearly five years since she walked back into my life after a temporary absence and at that time, with my somewhat innocent birthday phone call, there was no way I could predict a home, a marriage, a move, a legal ceremony, and our future plans. I adore my Jennifer and I want so badly for her to achieve her dreams and pull her stars down from the sky.
I remember when she told me she had feelings for me. I'd been enjoying several crushes with several wonderful people and she tossed the whole game. Jen doesn't have crushes - she's really kind of all or nothing. I didn't know whether to believe her the first time she said she was falling in love with me. We hadn't seen each other in several years and had only nightly phone calls for connection. I underestimated the force of her desires and the intensity of her emotions - intense in good and bad, though I wouldn't learn that for a little while. But I remember those chats, those early displays of affection, and how did those girls on those phones dream up a house in the country and a baby? When did we become so mainstream?
I told Jen, during one of those inky hours on the telephone before we saw each other again, that what I wanted most from our future together was a box of photos with her in them. Well, we don't really do paper photos much anymore but I do have a home full of picture frames of the two of us - Disney, Niagara, Ptown, Rebecca's bathtub. A home with a girl and our cats and our love and our dreams.
She's my wife and we're going to buy a house of our own in the beautiful Pioneer Valley and we will raise a family there, she and I. I never thought I would be challenging heterosexism by seeking heterosexual norms. I never thought I'd have a marriage license with her name on it. Someday, hopefully someday soon, I will have a birth certificate with her name on it as well.
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hopemcg and meglett are currently in Rehoboth Beach, home of our first kiss, our first confession of love, our first taste of the future. They already have the love, the home, and the baby. Maybe we're a little out of order. Maybe they can send us a little of the mojo for the house and the baby. We're surely sending them hopes of the magic of Rehoboth nights and love under the stars and beside the waves.
I remember when she told me she had feelings for me. I'd been enjoying several crushes with several wonderful people and she tossed the whole game. Jen doesn't have crushes - she's really kind of all or nothing. I didn't know whether to believe her the first time she said she was falling in love with me. We hadn't seen each other in several years and had only nightly phone calls for connection. I underestimated the force of her desires and the intensity of her emotions - intense in good and bad, though I wouldn't learn that for a little while. But I remember those chats, those early displays of affection, and how did those girls on those phones dream up a house in the country and a baby? When did we become so mainstream?
I told Jen, during one of those inky hours on the telephone before we saw each other again, that what I wanted most from our future together was a box of photos with her in them. Well, we don't really do paper photos much anymore but I do have a home full of picture frames of the two of us - Disney, Niagara, Ptown, Rebecca's bathtub. A home with a girl and our cats and our love and our dreams.
She's my wife and we're going to buy a house of our own in the beautiful Pioneer Valley and we will raise a family there, she and I. I never thought I would be challenging heterosexism by seeking heterosexual norms. I never thought I'd have a marriage license with her name on it. Someday, hopefully someday soon, I will have a birth certificate with her name on it as well.
hopemcg and meglett are currently in Rehoboth Beach, home of our first kiss, our first confession of love, our first taste of the future. They already have the love, the home, and the baby. Maybe we're a little out of order. Maybe they can send us a little of the mojo for the house and the baby. We're surely sending them hopes of the magic of Rehoboth nights and love under the stars and beside the waves.
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no subject
Date: 2006-09-06 01:07 am (UTC)I am anxious too to start the next chapter.
And honestly I never believed we'd have a home, a legal marriage license (yay Canada), furry babies (cats), etc. We started out 9 years ago in 2 different countries, for one.
There is no one else in whole wide world that I would want to make and raise a baby with but Abby.
no subject
Date: 2006-09-07 01:15 am (UTC)I really just want the next chapter to hurry up already. This chapter (the TTC chapter) is getting old.
no subject
Date: 2006-09-07 11:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-06 08:43 am (UTC)I hope the rest of the chapters in your life are just as good as this one.
I also hope to meet you both in person one day. You've been such a good supporter in this chapter in my life!
no subject
Date: 2006-09-07 01:16 am (UTC)We'd love to meet you, too! I never thought that I would get so close to my TTC sisters!
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Date: 2006-09-06 02:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-07 01:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-06 05:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-07 01:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-06 06:00 pm (UTC)You've helped to fill my day with wonderful thoughts.
I hope to meet the two of you someday.
no subject
Date: 2006-09-07 01:14 am (UTC)I think it's sweet that you add my happy memories to your memories. xo
no subject
Date: 2006-09-07 02:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-07 10:57 am (UTC)Enjoy your vacation!