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Devil Baby
Nov. 19th, 2007 02:54 pmSo about a week and a half ago, Punk started screaming at the breast. Not a little fussing, but a full out howl, arch back away, bloody murder dramarama. I tried every day for seven days after that - different times of day, different situations - same reaction.
So I guess nursing is over. I wondered how long it would go on after domperidone and I guess the answer was 5 weeks. And hey, that's five weeks I didn't think I would have, I guess, but it still breaks me up. Almost all of my friends here right now have little tiny babies and ALL of them are exclusively nursing. And I'm not talking 2 or 3 people. More than 10. I feel so craptacular about the whole thing.
And yeah, yeah, I know it's "not my fault" and I "did a lot" and blah blah blah. I do. I get it. But that doesn't make it suck less. And it doesn't stop me from thinking, 'Maybe Punk wouldn't do/feel/experience XYZ if I was nursing,' on at least a daily basis. Feh. And I know lots of people don't nurse, and formula babies are as good/smart/beautiful/insert adjective here. But that doesn't change the fact that I wanted to exclusively nurse my daughter. Or at least nurse her a little bit.
She did, however, sleep on me for an hour this afternoon and that was pretty nice, even if she was a heinous beast at the coffee house this morning. A friend said, "Oh, she reminds me of [her oldest child]! She was such a Devil Baby." I think she was trying to be helpful but it made me really bummed out. I don't like anyone calling Punk a "Devil Baby" or a "difficult baby" or a "bad baby" or whatever.
At least it didn't scare that woman away from having more kids (she has four now). That's good.
So I guess nursing is over. I wondered how long it would go on after domperidone and I guess the answer was 5 weeks. And hey, that's five weeks I didn't think I would have, I guess, but it still breaks me up. Almost all of my friends here right now have little tiny babies and ALL of them are exclusively nursing. And I'm not talking 2 or 3 people. More than 10. I feel so craptacular about the whole thing.
And yeah, yeah, I know it's "not my fault" and I "did a lot" and blah blah blah. I do. I get it. But that doesn't make it suck less. And it doesn't stop me from thinking, 'Maybe Punk wouldn't do/feel/experience XYZ if I was nursing,' on at least a daily basis. Feh. And I know lots of people don't nurse, and formula babies are as good/smart/beautiful/insert adjective here. But that doesn't change the fact that I wanted to exclusively nurse my daughter. Or at least nurse her a little bit.
She did, however, sleep on me for an hour this afternoon and that was pretty nice, even if she was a heinous beast at the coffee house this morning. A friend said, "Oh, she reminds me of [her oldest child]! She was such a Devil Baby." I think she was trying to be helpful but it made me really bummed out. I don't like anyone calling Punk a "Devil Baby" or a "difficult baby" or a "bad baby" or whatever.
At least it didn't scare that woman away from having more kids (she has four now). That's good.
