A little birdie told me that you can't make it by yourself

[judecorp]

I need to pack and hit the bed if I'm going to drag myself up at 4:30am to take a shower and get to the airport at 5:30 to go see a girl. I'll probably be checking LJ more than I usually do when I go away for the weekend, since The Girl will be sleeping a lot, I'd imagine.

Today was an interesting day. I was called 'dysfunctional' by Schoolmate Sheila because I like girls, I got completely furious at my boss, and I asked a lot of questions during a job interview for a friend of mine that basically ensured that he wouldn't get the job. At the same time, I learned that I really /am/ comfortable talking to anyone about anything A.-related, Coworker Stephanie bit me hard on the shoulder blade and gave me chills, and Schoolmate Jean said I was her best friend in our Families class.

So I leave you with this, even though I did it a couple of months ago:

Ask me something. Anything. I will answer. You betcha. Now's the time to ask the hard questions. There's no hour/day/week time limit. If it makes it here, I'll answer it. You can ask as many questions as you want, but only one at a time, because I'll get overwhelmed. :)

The price is that you have to answer this question:

One thing that really bugs me about you, Jude, is _______________.

Have a good weekend, kids!

Comments

I've got two questions...

[siercia]

I hope that doesn't mean I have to come up with two things that bug me... 'cause I don't know if I could.

But, the thing that really bugs me about you, Jude, is that you'll always be cooler than me. Or at least, you're cool in ways I wish I could be, but just look like a poser trying to pull off.

Question one: What was so difficut on last Sunday afternoon?

Question two: What would you do if you found out now that Aaron did still love you, and was only saying he didn't to let you leave with less guilt?

Re: I've got two questions...

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I am so not cooler than you, but thank you for saying so. You are so quintessentially cool. :)

Alright. Here goes nothing.

1. I was incredibly freaked out on Sunday afternoon. There are a few visceral abuse reactions that I have not been able to shake, and though I wish I could and I try, I don't know that I will. One is the way I flinch when someone's hand/limb catches me off guard and gets close to me. The other is an exaggerated startle reflex to loud noises. On Sunday afternoon when Hannah was crying and the door slammed, I lost it. Quite a bit, actually. The combination of baby-crying and anger and the loud noise of the door sent me over the top, and I was shaking pretty badly.

2. I think about this from time to time. Jen and I had a long talk about it one day, when I was having a hard time (still am!) getting Aaron to help me with divorce stuff. And the truth of the matter is that I would feel /terrible/. Had it been a few (5 or 6) months ago, I would give up everything and go back to him, because I made a promise, because I'd given my word. But now, I couldn't do that, too much has happened, and, well, I would still leave, but I would feel like a big pile of dog crap about it, because I would be deliberately breaking a promise, and that doesn't sit well with me.

And, truth be told, I would be pissed as hell for being lied to and manipulated, because honesty is crucial to me.

(These are very good questions.)