...hate me cause I'm different, hate me cause I'm gay...

[judecorp]

I snapped at some friends today, and for that, I apologize. Sorry, Patti and Steve.

For the first time ever in the history of my (short) life, I'm in a group of friends where it's really kind of "one of these kids is not like the others." (Okay, well, I've always been the odd duck, but not usually about one specific thing...)

My friends are all open-minded, very cool people, and I'm thrilled about that. I mean, hell, when Jen is here, they are all totally cool with her, and with me, and it's like no one bats an eyelash. I love that. It's just the jokes that are starting to wear me down. I don't mind being teased (I can't think of a single person who /doesn't/ relate to me by teasing me, including my boss.), I'm just tired of being teased about the same damned thing all the time.

There is more to my personality than liking girls.

I guess it started with the "sisters" thing, or maybe it really got started with the "don't make yourself look too pretty, Lara, cause Jude will try to hump you" thing. I'm not sure. I know that one at a time, the comments don't bother me, but put together and accumulated over time and I'm stuck wondering if I'm seen as anything other than "that gay girl we're friends with." There are much weirder things to make fun of me about.

For instance, I am completely OCD about my closet. My shirts are hung up all facing the same direction. Anything else drives me nuts. And they're arranged by what kind of shirts they are: sleeveless, short-sleeved, long-sleeved, button down, etc. That's pretty weird.

I leave funny voicemail messages. I start out speaking very slowly and deliberately, and then I get all neurotic about taking too long on the message and I speed up. And I end nearly every message with "okaygottagobye" *click*.

I have a zillion smurf items all over my house. There are about 60 plastic smurf figurines in my bedroom, along with a smurf piggybank, some smurf playsets, a smurf pillowcase, and smurf comic books. In the living room, there are several stuffed smurfs. There is a smurf lunchbox in the kitchen, and there is a handmade smurf in shining armor (thanks, Jennifer!) and some more smurf figurines on my computer desk. There is a smurf suction-cupped to my kitchen sink. There used to be a smurf hanging in my car, but I'm going to give it to Steve. I have a smurf tshirt. I have smurf shoelaces on my brown shoes (thanks 'stina!). I have smurfs on my computer at work. That's weird.

Today, Steve teased me by putting one of those "Power of Pride" American flag bumper stickers on my car. Once I realized that it was only stuck on with electrical tape, I got a good laugh about it. That was pretty funny. I /do/ need to not be so anal-retentive about Gargamel. (But he'd prolly have a bird if I did something to one of his vehicles.)

Either way, I guess I'm becoming a bit overly sensitive about the queer jokes. I'm not the only queer person in the universe, but I'm starting to feel that way when I spend a lot of time with everyone. I feel very singled out. I need to not be so sensitive about that, I guess.

I suppose this is the time where Ryan posts some comment about me being a lesbian. ;)

Comments

[kungfoogirl.livejournal.com]

Come to see the Indigo Girls with me.
Then, like, we'll be the MAJORITY. By far.

=)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Do we have tickets?

[juliann.livejournal.com]

I try to tease you about everything I can think of ;)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

You are just a tease, period. :)

[mightywombat.livejournal.com]

For instance, I am completely OCD about my closet. My shirts are hung up all facing the same direction. Anything else drives me nuts. And they're arranged by what kind of shirts they are: sleeveless, short-sleeved, long-sleeved, button down, etc. That's pretty weird.

Holy Angel of Anal Retention, Batman! I thought I was the only one who did that! Mine are even arranged by color... You're not weird, smurfy... we're perfectly normal. It's the rest of the world that's not all there.

Okay, you win!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Mine are not arranged by color. And I've started, just a little, to mix the button downs with the other long-sleeves. But just a little. Not too much. ;)

[oddharmonic.livejournal.com]

I do too -- and not only that, I do that with my daughter's clothes, especially since we've been sharing a closet for most of the past year. When I was living with my husband, I did that to his clothes (not much in the closet other than uniforms and combat boots, but hey) and went so far as to take the labelmaker and label all the shelves of folded clothing too.

I think we should start an LJ community for people who do this.

Not so incidentally, I store t-shirts, long-sleeve non-hanging shirts and towels all by folding them in half lengthwise (and again width-wise for towels) and rolling them up into a neat little package... yet it's my husband who was diagnosed with OCD. He only does the bare minimum of clothes-putting-away, so I guess it works.

sooooo. . . .

[la-luna.livejournal.com]

I'm not even on your friends list or anything, but I was looking through your journal and saw this and ROLLED!!! Fact is, I arrange the clothing in my closet according to, first, type of clothing (dresses, skirts, jeans, slacks, shirts, sexy things, and outerwear). . .and then, within each type of thing, I arrange them not just by the color, but by the SPECTRUM. . .and yes, all my hangers must face the same way. And my shoes are on racks. The rest of my house, I cannot account for, but by god, I can FIND stuff in that closet ;)

As out as I am and as you apparently are, do you suppose there is some metaphor in all this closet business? heee. . . .

(sorry, I know this is an older post of yours, but I had to respond. great stuff!)

[zarabeth.livejournal.com]

I leave funny voicemail messages. I start out speaking very slowly and deliberately, and then I get all neurotic about taking too long on the message and I speed up. And I end nearly every message with "okaygottagobye" *click*.

Heh. I still have your voicemail message on my voicemail from all those months ago, from when we saw Hedwig. The one that starts out, "hey, um, it's Jude, and you know, I was just calling cause I said I'd call." And gets even more q00t from there on. Every 30 days the voicemail asks me to delete it but it's so q00t I just can't. I save it again and again. I could probably transcribe the whole thing from memory by this point.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but did I end it with "okaygottagobye" *click*?

[kungfoogirl.livejournal.com]

And I thought THEY were weird.

[badadam.livejournal.com]

#1: my shirts: All facing the same way, t's on one side, buttons on the other. Black on the left, White on the right, color in the middle.

#2: on my voicemail the other day you said: "this is adam... this is jude..." for your introduction...

#3: I can't stand when somebody opens a soda can or bottle and then hands it to me... I'm a freak too...

#4: I love you

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

#2: on my voicemail the other day you said: "this is adam... this is jude..." for your introduction...

That's because you answer your phone with "this is adam," and it's always in the same tone of voice, and it's really cute.

[zuzubailey76.livejournal.com]

Wait a second. . .you're a GAY?

I'm always the last to know these things.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I'm one of those young whippersnappers, aren't I?

[prunesnprisms.livejournal.com]

For instance, I am completely OCD about my closet. My shirts are hung up all facing the same direction. Anything else drives me nuts. And they're arranged by what kind of shirts they are: sleeveless, short-sleeved, long-sleeved, button down, etc. That's pretty weird.

I had a sociology professor who was completely OCD about his closet, the only reason I remember it was because it was how he described OCD to us...this was (shit) 1993?

And I'm sure I confuse people, because for everytime someone answers the phone, I answer 'Hello?' right back. My poor mom thinks we haven't gotten a clear connection in years.

I'm going to tell this chick on Sunday about all your smurfage and see if she still likes you.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Heh. I can hear the conversation now...

(Thanks again for doing that, S.)

To be fair you are really really really

[death2kittens.livejournal.com]

really gay.

[happy2beso.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry. :-/

You're right.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Right that there's more to me than liking girls? I sure hope so!

p.s. I hope you're having fun in your travels right now!

[00solstice.livejournal.com]

(But he'd prolly have a bird if I did something to one of his vehicles.)

your very right. but like you, once i saw it wasn't permanent, I would have a good laugh... as long as it was trully funny, of course. ;-)

You forgot to mention that you are jingophobic. Or perhaps that is more of a core value than an ideosyncracy... Therefore making it a more sensitive issue. It is what precipitated the discussion after all...

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Jingophobic? Nah, not phobic. I just loathe it.

Then again, I loathe most patriotism/nationalism, and jingoism is way worse than that.

Payback's a bitch, you know. :)

[whod81.livejournal.com]

I don't really have anything interestign to say right now cuz I'm in a bad mood.

But.. *hug*.

Bad mood?

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

*hug*

Love you.

[carina-s.livejournal.com]

I like you.