Don't let some foolish heart leave you bitter.

[judecorp]

I really need to find that fine line between "concerned about something quite a lot" and "neurotic mess." Because, really, my stress level has been so high that there's no longer a boundary. It's like something happens, and I start to react somewhat strongly to it, and then wham! Neurotic mess. And I'm not really sure what is truly stressing me out. I mean, sure, I'm not so keen on my job, but I'm usually in a decent mood while I'm /at/ work, because I like my coworkers. And sure, I'm struggling with the financial plan of moving out of state sooner than expected while still trying to buy a girl a house, but I'm not sure that really influences my mental state. I keep trying to find one (or more) thing(s) that's different now than last year, when I seemed to be on much more of an even keel.

The only thing I can think of is that I'm not having as much sex. Who wants to help?

I ended up going to Jim Lantz's viewing. I hadn't seen a done-up dead person since I was about 10 years old, when my aunt's mother died. Gah. They look so freaking FAKE. How can people stand it? I so don't want that to be me.

Comments

[hope-persists.livejournal.com]

hey sweetie. Hopefully your vacation will help your stress level out a whole bunch. And, as I have said before, if you gals are looking in Noho, you can crash on my couch for a week or so while looking at places and working things out. Hotels can be expensive (although fun!).

But yeah, that whole crossing the line to neurotic mess without noticing thing sucks. Maybe it's time to look into finding a private therapist?

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I'm really putting some high hopes on this vacation. Our trip to San Francisco last summer was really good for us and our mental states, and I'd really like that to happen again. However, I don't want to put TOO much pressure on this trip, because it will be busy and I don't want it to freak us out. I'm just looking forward to some uninterrupted time with my smoochie.

And you're right about the therapist. I need to find some time in my week for it. (And check insurance, of course. Ugh.)

[calledmara.livejournal.com]

hey. I offered to help. :P

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

True. You certainly did, Christmas Lobster.

[mermil.livejournal.com]

Well, it's kind of a vicious circle, right? If you feel horribly stressed out, it's not going to put you in a mood for hot lerfin. Yeah, I said hot lerfin. The fact that you know you're operating at a feverishly high pitch is a good start, though...it means you're starting to get some sort of perspective on what's bugging you, rather than being immersed in it. I hope you feel better soon, though, cookie.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Well, the thing is, I'm /always/ in the mood for hot lerfin! But some people (*cough*Jennifer*cough*) are not in the mood when things aren't so great, so yeah, I see what you're saying.

Thing is, when I'm stressed, it makes me want the hot lerfin /MORE/, because it calms me down. So yeah, we're at loggerheads on that one.

Love you!!

[iansha.livejournal.com]

It's not an easy line to find sometimes. I think people, especially, 'professionals', are so tuned into a quasi 'shut-off' state that when it comes to themselves, they are either nothing or 'total complete freak out'. I admit I am the latter.

I hate viewings. I go anyway, though... I feel... 'obligated'.

*superhugsandlove*

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I think you raise a valid point. I mean, I know I can point out people in my office who are either "shut off" or "neurotic messes." I have one coworker who bursts into tears at least once per week.

I think at work I am the "shut off" person... so then when I get home, it's easy to become the "neurotic mess."

Happy holidays and safe travelling, dear!

[carina-s.livejournal.com]

MEEP and BLEEP!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

PANTS!

[carina-s.livejournal.com]

SHIRTS!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

UNDERWEAR!

[carina-s.livejournal.com]

CHURCHES!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

VERY SMALL ROCKS!

[kat-chan.livejournal.com]

There's reasons why I want to be cremated. The fakeishness of being laid-out is one of those reasons.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Amen to that.