Not a very good friend
Jan. 5th, 2005 09:34 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
judecorpI just had a great conversation with a good friend of mine. Unfortunately I had to get off the phone because my cell phone battery was about to die, and I didn't want to have to talk with my head attached to the cradle plugged into the outlet in my bedroom. But it was nice to chat for a few minutes.
It's no secret that this friend of mine is going through a really rough time lately, and I really wish I lived closer so that I could actually do something more than just chat, like do something concrete to really help out or something. I feel kind of useless in that regard, because I know I could be a much bigger help if I were closer.
What sucks is that I had a lot of opportunities to spend QT with her when I lived in Columbus, and we both really let our busy lives get the best of us most of the time. I mean, sure, we got together and had good times, but I feel like I should have spent more time and just plain done more for her. The sorts of things she's struggling with now don't just come out of nowhere, and I wonder what kind of "good" friend I could have been that I didn't know all of these things were brewing just under the surface.
I know I can't take /all/ of the responsibility here, but I definitely feel like there was likely more I could have done when I lived in Columbus. If I had spent more time and put out more effort, maybe I would have seen some of these things and been a better help. Maybe I would have made more plans, offered more suggestions, talked more, provided more distractions... I can't help but feel like I just plain should have known she was upset, but the truth is that I had absolutely no clue. And I feel pretty bad about that.
I tend to think of myself as a pretty good friend to have, but when you get right down to it, I'm really self-absorbed. Lately I haven't been available to /anyone/ outside of my household really. One of my friends here in town was admitted into the hospital recently and while I vaguely noted her absence, it really didn't register because I'm so busy. But busy is such a shitty excuse. I need to find a way to get out of my own head and be a better friend.
It's no secret that this friend of mine is going through a really rough time lately, and I really wish I lived closer so that I could actually do something more than just chat, like do something concrete to really help out or something. I feel kind of useless in that regard, because I know I could be a much bigger help if I were closer.
What sucks is that I had a lot of opportunities to spend QT with her when I lived in Columbus, and we both really let our busy lives get the best of us most of the time. I mean, sure, we got together and had good times, but I feel like I should have spent more time and just plain done more for her. The sorts of things she's struggling with now don't just come out of nowhere, and I wonder what kind of "good" friend I could have been that I didn't know all of these things were brewing just under the surface.
I know I can't take /all/ of the responsibility here, but I definitely feel like there was likely more I could have done when I lived in Columbus. If I had spent more time and put out more effort, maybe I would have seen some of these things and been a better help. Maybe I would have made more plans, offered more suggestions, talked more, provided more distractions... I can't help but feel like I just plain should have known she was upset, but the truth is that I had absolutely no clue. And I feel pretty bad about that.
I tend to think of myself as a pretty good friend to have, but when you get right down to it, I'm really self-absorbed. Lately I haven't been available to /anyone/ outside of my household really. One of my friends here in town was admitted into the hospital recently and while I vaguely noted her absence, it really didn't register because I'm so busy. But busy is such a shitty excuse. I need to find a way to get out of my own head and be a better friend.
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no subject
Date: 2005-01-06 11:44 am (UTC)And the good news is we don't have to hang out in your head. The *BETTER* news is that I won't make you watch football!
So...it's January. What're you guys doing next weekend? Or perhaps the one after that?
no subject
Date: 2005-01-06 09:08 pm (UTC)(Aside from Jen working Saturdays, which is a fact of life that pretty much sucks ALL THE TIME.)
So what do you want to do? I'm up for pretty much anything, unless it involves edible underwear.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-12 11:24 am (UTC)HEY! THE 21ST IS SQUIRREL APPRETIATION DAY!
But, really, do you still not have plans for most of that weekend? (Fingers crossed...)
no subject
Date: 2005-01-12 01:49 pm (UTC)Hey, when's the Super Bowl? Are you having people over? Will they all be huge fans of football? Do you want to come here? Hunh hunh hunh?
no subject
Date: 2005-01-13 11:31 am (UTC)As far as the Super Bowl on sunday, February 6 goes...I don't know what or where we'll be. Frank & Jen have a Super Bowl party every year, but between you and me (and anyone else reading this...of which I doubt they are), that's not looking too good for us. SO, Melis was thinking about inviting Eric & Tamar over and Ami & Jay down and we'd all head over to The Strand...you must've heard us rant and rave about this place. It's the movie theater in Clinton...anyway, they also do all Pats games. Don't know if they'll have the Super Bowl, but if they do...mang...I'm thinking you two kids will have to come out here for that...if they have it, of course...which we'll know soon, because the Super Bowl isn't until February, afterall...am I still talking?
no subject
Date: 2005-01-14 04:07 am (UTC)As far as I know, Jen will not be working on the 21st. I don't think we have any kind of plans (as in, there is nothing on the calendar), and I would love to invite you two this-a-way for entertainment. Perhaps we can make you guys a nice dinner and then bore you with movies or board games or something.
What do you say to that?
no subject
Date: 2005-01-08 04:34 pm (UTC)This made me cry.
Do you know that you are so awesome that I have conquered my stupid I hate phones problem just to call you?
no subject
Date: 2005-01-08 04:36 pm (UTC)(Seriously, I never answer the phone anymore.)