I have discovered the secret!

[judecorp]

After trying on all of Nikki's maternity clothes, I have finally discovered the secret to "looking pregnant." Clearly the secret is wearing those big, poochy maternity pants with the full belly. (I have a couple of pairs of maternity pants, but because I am vain they are "no panel" or "small panel" or whatever.) I put all of those stretchy, poochy pants on and HOLY CRAP, I look like I have a gigantic belly. Add a shirt that widens after the boobs, and PRESTO!

So THAT'S how they do it!

I still don't feel like I'm big enough to warrant some of those clothes (and most of the shirts are short-sleeved which will come in handy later), but woah, for a moment there I considered walking around (freezing) in one of those outfits going, "HA HA HA."

Encyclopedia Brown strikes again!

Comments

[childlight.livejournal.com]

We get naked belly pictures...I want to see the poochy pants and fluffy shirt pictures too! :-)

While I know it isn't polite for you to post a baby registry and plead for gifts it is perfectly acceptable for your friends to ask for said registry. So wanna share? :-) Feel free to email me if you prefer.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Oh my gosh, I should find the grossest maternity shirt in existence (maybe I will scope a Goodwill or something) and take a really dorky picture full of bows or whatever. I will get on that. (I'm planning to go thrift for some baby clothes soon, so...)

I just tried the clothes on quickly this morning to see if they fit (Nikki is quite a bit thinner than I am, or at least I always think everyone is thinner than I am) - as most of them are spring/summer I won't be wearing them soon. Although there is a pair of track pants in there that are SO COMFY I think I will wear them tomorrow!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

As for the registry, we are totally putting the finishing touches on them and then I will probably offer them to whoever wants them. I would post them here but I try to keep my last name off the internets.

[eeka13.livejournal.com]

Just tell us where...we can search! :o)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Since you know my name already, you can hunt us down on BabiesRUs and Target.

[eeka13.livejournal.com]

Will do.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Sweet!

[aminahfiddler.livejournal.com]

I tried honest I tried but I can't resist any longer. Finally the big hips and belly are showing ;-)

Seriously yea for the baby belly. I can't wait to hear stories about you not being able to see your feet!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

VIVA BIG HIPS!

Baby bellies are kind of cool. I can see why they lose their appeal when they get SO big, but as someone who will only be doing this once, I kind of dig it. It's like one big science experiment.

[gimmeapony.livejournal.com]

You're padding! Padding, I say! :)

I think it's great that your ex-pregnant friends are sharing baby clothes. I always wondered what people did with them after they gave birth and it's nice to know that people recycle. I bet you could do really well to open a second hand preggo clothing store chain!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think a lot of people save them if they think they are going to have more kids, but a lot get passed around. Which is good, because nothing sucks more than buying a bunch of weirdly-shaped clothes that you will never wear again! :)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

I will have to model something for you. Schwanky!

[wendywoowho.livejournal.com]

You and Jen were in my dream last night! You were both wearing TONS of pastels, and you were complaining that you only looked pregnant in your butt (which you then showed off, clad in, yes, maternity jeans). Nick and I were renting a room in your basement, and a squirrel bit me, and we were concerned about rabies...

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Ha ha ha ha about the pastels. I don't think Jen OWNS anything pastel that I haven't bought or chosen for her (and she never wears). But I'm sorry a rabid squirrel bit you in my house. I will watch out for that.

[wendywoowho.livejournal.com]

She had on black pants with her pastel floral top. Which, yes, you bought for her.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

That is so kind of me. I have such good taste in pastels and florals. :)

[thatpatti.livejournal.com]

well, of course! because when you try to wear regular pants, the waistband just cuts your belly in the middle and give you an extra roll which just makes you look chubbeh! the materntiy pants sorta smoooooth it all out and make it look nice and round and cute! which is why i'm a fan of maternity pants ASAP. :)

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

So true. So true. Whenever I wear my "fat pants" from 30lbs ago (actually 20lbs now, oops) I just look like a fat old man.

I just never knew there was such a difference between full panel and no panel maternity pants!!

[keelamonster.livejournal.com]

the trick to looking pregnant will always be this: Empire waistlines.

Any shirt that pooches below the boobs makes a girl with a belly look pregnant. Baby on board or no.

what size do you wear, I have some leftover maternity things I was just bagging up today. You can email me so that you're not sharing your size on your journal. :)

Also, Liz Lang and In Due Time maternity clothes from target rock. And they're cheap. And Kohl's carries Oh Baby! clothes that are from Mimi maternity. Mimi is WAY too pricey (unless you hit the clearance rack just right) but the Oh Baby! stuff is really reasonable. Good tshirts and stuff.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

The problem with empire waistlines (at least with most maternity shirts) is that they seem to assume a certain amount of boobage, which I most certainly do not have. So everything that is heavily boobed looks like a tent on me.

My pants size kind of fluctuates between 10 and 12 (I know, weird) although much more on the 12 side of things these days. I guess that would be L in the SML camp. Shirts are more of an M because of the boob thing.

I have a pair of maternity jeans from Target and a couple from Old Navy, but I don't really want to buy any more than I have to because I will never be wearing them again. I don't know if we have a Kohl's in the area - I will have to check. Usually I've been scoping Old Navy.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Heh, boys can be so clueless sometimes. But it's true, regular clothes just kind of tent up, whereas I guess maternity clothes are made to scream "LOOK HOW PREGNANT I AM!"

Too bad I don't like the look of most maternity clothes. :)

[amyura.livejournal.com]

It's funny, we always want what we can't have. I remember wanting to be bigger, and then all of the sudden I was HUGE and only had, like, five things that still fit. Then I was longing to be not pregnant and have everything fit. Then, very soon after Julia was out, it did, thanks to nursing, and whaddya know, I miss being pregnant!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think it definitely comes in stages - the wanting the cute belly stage quickly rolls into the too big to put on shoes stage.

Thankfully I think I will hit that stage during flip-flop season. I hope.

[(Anonymous)]

Jude,
We do have a Kohls. I think it's in Chicopee or maybe W.Springfield. Near a Home Depot, I think...gosh I am not really so helpful here am I? But I know there is one around here.

Glad to hear that you are enjoying maternity clothing (and getting to borrow it!)...now about those pictures!

xoxoxo
e.
http://twomomsarebetterthanone.wordpress.com/

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Oh wow, thanks for the info!

xoxo