PITA Birth Records

[judecorp]

(x-posted to july2007babies, sorry if you see it twice)

Oh, what a huge PITA.

So today Jen and I got a stack of papers we were supposed to get two months ago with a bunch of papers we'll need to bring to our birth center. You know, like releases and stuff. Well, one of them is a "birth certificate worksheet" and there's a whole bunch of info on "Mother of the Child" and then a whole bunch of info on "Father of the Child." Then on another sheet of paper there was a phone number and "Call Michelle with questions," so I did. Hello, Michelle.

Jen and I were a little baffled because a) we are not putting any "Father of the Child" information on our birth certificate, but b) Jen and I are married and therefore she is also legally responsible for our kid.

According to Michelle, what WE are supposed to do with our birth certificate information is this:

1. I am supposed to cross out everything that says "Father" and write in "Second Parent." (How professional.) And make sure that I check the box that says I am married.
2. When the kid is born, the birth center - instead of just sending the forms to the Town Clerk for immediate processing - has to fax my crossed-out document to the Records Department in Boston so they can check it over.
3. Then, our paperwork has to GO TO COURT in Boston so that a judge can "decide what to do with it." It is up to the judge whether they put the second parent information on or not.

"Michelle, what does the judge usually do?" Apparently the judge USUALLY puts the second parent on the birth certificate.

USUALLY? Like, sometimes the judge can just decide NOT to? Oh holy hell, Michelle, you say all of this with such a chipper voice and I just want to strangle you with my telephone cord.

Comments

[artemis44.livejournal.com]

The way they explained it to us was that we did indeed have to cross out "father" and write in "mother" (and don't even get us started on the gender issues that can bring up!), and the one we got in the mail did indeed have little typed xxxx's over teh father parts and stuff - which, it appears, may or may not hold up in court since the law says only unaltered birth certificates are valid. But that's the system we have, so that's what we did.

However, they made NO mention of a judge, and honestly, I don't think one was involved. It was just a matter of it going downtown, getting typed out and stamped, and then being mailed to the city he was born in and the city we live in. No judge involved... Now, maybe for unmarried folk a judge is involved, but I really, really, really don't think so in our cases.

Perhaps give a quick call to GLAD? They have lawyer referrals as well...

Are y'all going to do the second-parent adoption? We are, because every time we travel across state lines, it makes us nervous... once we get the second-parent adoption finalized, then C is legally recognized as a parent, even by the feds...

sigh... frustrating that it takes so much work to get our little family recognized and safe, but so worth it.

Good luck, and let us know what you find out!

[kieron.livejournal.com]

We are doing 2nd parent adoption - ESPECIALLY so the feds will recognize us - but also for that pesky across state lines deal that makes me nervous as hell as well.

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

We /are/ planning to go through the second-parent adoption process... when we can come up with the money. It's costly! (Ouch.)

I am more than a little concerned about receiving a "modified" birth certificate. One would think that after all of this time they could have come up with a non-gender-specific birth certificate form, so you wouldn't have to have a bunch of Xs. Talk about making someone's family look totally awkwrd.

Maybe I will have to give GLAD a little phone call. Good idea!

[artemis44.livejournal.com]

It was explained to me that the Governor (or his appointee) is in charge of authorizing any changes to the birth certificate form, and that this was Romney's little way of sticking it to the queers... the assumption is that they would hold up in Mass, since it was Mass officials who cleared them in the first place, but it seems to me that some backward judge in tennessee or texas could easily use the altered documents as an excuse to tear a family apart...

course, that could just be from my experience as a kid of a queer, growing up in texas, with the ever-present knowledge that I could be taken away at any time... paranoid much? nah...

and yeah, the second-party adoption fee is quite the insult-added-to-injury, no? I mean, $2K just to get a judge to let my partner ADOPT hir own freakin' kid?!?!??! You've got to be kidding me! Luckily, the tax credit we got from declaring me "head of household", thanks to the bean, is paying for it this year... convenient!

Okay, clearly I am avoiding work with these long comments, so I will attempt to extract myself from el-jay and return to work. Also known as "see you in 10 minutes!" lol!

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm not at all surprised about Romney. I have no nice things to say about him. I'm especially cheesed right now about his "universal health care" mandate that is going to require working class and lower-middle-class folks to purchase health insurance that they really can't afford - because it is required! Grrrr. Douchebag.

But yeah, it seems like a slap in the face to go through the legal rigamarole of adoption for a baby that we've planned for for a really long time. Especially the home study. I mean, I know it's mostly a formality but someone's going to come into our family home and decide if it's fit for the child that is already living in it? Grump.

I'm glad you managed to get it covered with tax returns. We're not sure how we're going to file next year. Theoretically Jen should be HoH because she's actually worked a decent amount, but I don't know if the Feds will allow her to claim the baby (or me, for that matter) as her dependent without having done the adoption - even with the botched MA birth certificate.

[artemis44.livejournal.com]

from what we saw, the HoH has little to do with genetics, actually, and is only about who pays for 50%+ of the child's expenses, so she should qualify.

Of course, I am SO FAR from being a tax pro - or even a tax amateur - so definitely check it out... and let us know what you find out! But from what I saw, it was all about the benjamins...

[judecorp.livejournal.com]

Cool, I'm sure I'll be researching heavily before next April. :)